In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best kermit jokes, kermit puns and kermit dad jokes to make you laugh.
Kermit the Frog Jokes: The Funniest Memes and Puns
1. Why did Kermit go to the bank?
To get a green loan!
2. What did Kermit say when Miss Piggy asked if he wanted dessert?
“No thanks, I’m already stuffed!”
3. How does Kermit keep his pants up?
With a waistband!
4. Why did Kermit start a band?
Because he had a frog in his throat!
5. What do you call it when Kermit gets sunburned?
A frog roast!
6. What’s Kermit’s favorite type of music?
Hip-hop!
7. Why was Kermit so good at math?
He was great at croaking numbers!
8. What did Kermit say when he broke his phone?
“I guess it’s time to get a new hoppertunity!”
9. Why did Kermit bring a ladder to the bar?
He heard the drinks were on the house!
10. What did Kermit say to the bartender?
“I’ll have a soda and a jumbo fly, please!”
Hilarious Kermit Jokes That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud
1. What do you get when you cross Kermit with a vampire?
A croaksucker!
2. Why did Kermit wear a tuxedo to the dinner party?
To impress the chicks!
3. How does Kermit like his coffee?
Frogged!
4. Why was Kermit bad at baseball?
He always caught flies!
5. What did Kermit say when he was asked to play hide and seek?
“I’ll be easy to spot, I’m always green!”
6. How did Kermit become a detective?
He had a knack for finding croak-roaches!
7. Why was Kermit always so calm?
He practiced zen-froggy!
8. What did Kermit do when the music stopped?
He took the next leap!
9. Why did Kermit break up with Miss Piggy?
She was always hogging the spotlight!
10. What did Kermit say when he won the Nobel Peace Prize?
“It’s not easy being green and peaceful!”
Top Kermit the Frog Funny Jokes for Muppet Fans
1. Why was Kermit always the life of the party?
Because he knew how to ribbit up the crowd!
2. What did Kermit say when Fozzie Bear asked if he wanted to hear a joke?
“Sure, I’m all ears!”
3. How does Kermit like his sandwich?
Frog on a roll!
4. Why was Kermit afraid of the dark?
He was always worried about getting eaten by a snake in the grass!
5. What did Kermit say when he found a four-leaf clover?
“Looks like I have a leg up on luck!”
6. Why did Kermit wear sunglasses to the beach?
To avoid being recognized as a celebrity!
7. How does Kermit stay in shape?
He hops on the treadmill every day!
8. What did Kermit say when he heard a good joke?
“That’s ribbiting!”
9. Why was Kermit always the best student in school?
He never skipped a hop!
10. What did Kermit say when he saw a rainbow?
“It’s a perfect day for a rainbow connection!”
Laugh Along with These Kermit Memes and Jokes
1. Why did Kermit break up with his girlfriend?
She was a real pain in the frog!
2. What did Kermit say when he found a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow?
“I guess I really am lucky!”
3. How does Kermit greet his friends?
“Hey-o, green beans!”
4. Why was Kermit always so good at karaoke?
He had the perfect croak-tune!
5. What did Kermit say when he saw a shooting star?
“I wish I may, I wish I might, have some flies for dinner tonight!”
6. How does Kermit like his steak cooked?
Medium-rare!
7. Why was Kermit always the designated driver?
He couldn’t hold his hops!
8. What did Kermit say when he saw a frog crossing sign?
“Looks like I have the right of way!”
9. Why did Kermit get kicked out of the library?
He was reading too many croak and dagger novels!
10. What did Kermit say when asked if he believed in aliens?
“I think they’re just out of this world!”
Ribbiting Humor: The Best Kermit Jokes for Every Occasion
1. Why did Kermit start a landscaping business?
He had a green thumb!
2. What did Kermit say when he saw a rainbow-colored car?
“That’s one colorful croak-mobile!”
3. How does Kermit like his eggs?
Scrambled!
4. Why was Kermit always so good at gardening?
He had a knack for planting croak-seeds!
5. What did Kermit say when he heard a good joke about frogs?
“That’s toad-ally hilarious!”
6. Why did Kermit go to the doctor?
He was feeling a little green around the gills!
7. How does Kermit relax after a long day?
By soaking in a hot lily pad!
8. What did Kermit say when he saw a frog-themed restaurant?
“I wonder if they have a frog leg special!”
9. Why was Kermit always the peacemaker?
He knew how to frogive and forget!
10. What did Kermit say when he saw a frog prince?
“Looks like he finally found his ribbiting companion!”