In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best calendar jokes, calendar puns and calendar dad jokes to make you laugh.
Funny Calendar Jokes: Keeping Things Light and Organized
1. Why did the calendar break up with the clock? It felt like it was always running out of time!
2. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the calendar? “Time to clean up my act!”
3. Why did the calendar go to therapy? It had too many emotional days.
4. How does a calendar get in shape? It exercises its dates!
5. Why was the calendar cold? Because it left its dates open!
6. What did one calendar say to the other? “I feel like we’ve been through a lot of days together!”
7. How does a calendar end a fight? It turns the page.
8. Why did the calendar go to school? It wanted to improve its dates!
9. What’s a calendar’s favorite music genre? Pop!
10. Why did the calendar refuse to jump in the ocean? It didn’t want to get tide down!
Laugh Your Day Away with These Hilarious Calendar Jokes
1. What do you call a calendar that’s always happy? A “date” calendar!
2. Why was the calendar always on time? It had a great sense of “consecutive” timing!
3. What did the calendar say to the detective? “I have some dates that need investigating!”
4. Why did the calendar win the race? It had a lot of dates to get through!
5. What do you call a calendar that’s always late? Out of “schedule”!
6. Why do calendars get into arguments? They can’t agree on the dates!
7. What do you get when you cross a calendar with a notebook? A schedule!
8. Why did the calendar break up with the calculator? It couldn’t count on it!
9. How do you fix a broken calendar? You give it some more days off!
10. Why didn’t the calendar go to the party? It heard it was going to be a date night!
Time Flies When You’re Reading These Side-Splitting Calendar Jokes
1. Why did the calendar go to therapy? It always felt like it was being pushed around!
2. What did the calendar say to the clock? “You’ve got a lot of hands on time!”
3. Why did the calendar go to the party alone? It didn’t have a date!
4. Why did the calendar join the circus? It heard they needed someone with good dates!
5. What’s a calendar’s favorite game? Date-tennis!
6. Why did the calendar get in trouble? It had a lot of “days of our lives” drama!
7. What’s a calendar’s favorite snack? Dates, of course!
8. How do you make a calendar laugh? You tickle its dates!
9. Why did the calendar want to become a comedian? It had a lot of timing jokes!
10. How do you calm down an angry calendar? You give it some space and time to cool off!
Calendar Comedy: Jokes to Make Every Day Brighter
1. Why did the calendar get promoted? It had a lot of “date” experience!
2. What do you call a calendar on the beach? Sandy dates!
3. Why did the calendar refuse to go on a date? It was too busy planning its future!
4. What did the calendar say to the weather? “I’ve got my dates all lined up!”
5. Why did the calendar go to the doctor? It was feeling run down!
6. How do you make a calendar more interesting? You add some important dates!
7. Why did the calendar go to the spa? It needed some relaxation time!
8. What do you call a calendar in a hurry? A “deadline” calendar!
9. How does a calendar apologize? It makes up for lost time!
10. Why did the calendar run out of room? It had too many dates lined up!
Don’t Miss Out on These Rib-Tickling Calendar Jokes for a Good Time
1. Why did the calendar go to the beach by itself? It wanted some alone time to reflect on its dates!
2. What do you call a calendar with no sense of humor? A “dry” calendar!
3. Why was the calendar afraid of the clock? It heard it was “second” best!
4. What did the calendar say to the alarm clock? “I’ve got you covered on the wake-up calls!”
5. Why did the calendar book a vacation? It needed a break from all the scheduling!
6. How did the calendar become popular? It had a lot of great “date” nights!
7. What’s a calendar’s favorite movie genre? Time-travel adventures!
8. Why did the calendar become a chef? It wanted to spice up its dates!
9. What do you get when you cross a calendar with a map? A “date” planner!
10. Why did the calendar go to the gym? It wanted to stay in “shape”!