In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best washington dc jokes, washington dc puns and washington dc dad jokes to make you laugh.
1. Hilarious Washington DC Jokes to Make You Laugh Out Loud
1. Why did the politician go to Washington DC? To see if he could change his flip-flopping ways!
2. What did the Washington DC tourist say to the statue of Abraham Lincoln? “Can I get a selfie with you, Mr. President?”
3. How does a Washington DC politician keep their breath fresh? By constantly blowing hot air!
4. Why did the Capitol building break up with the White House? They just couldn’t agree on anything!
5. What do you call a group of politicians stuck in traffic in Washington DC? A filibuster!
6. Why did the Washington DC squirrel join the political party? He heard they had a lot of nutty followers!
7. How do you get a ticket to the Washington Monument? You have to be outstanding in your field!
8. What do you call a ghost haunting the Senate building in Washington DC? A Polit-boo!
9. Why do Washington DC politicians make terrible comedians? Their jokes are too politically correct!
10. What do you call a Washington DC chef who specializes in spicy dishes? A lobbyist for hot peppers!
2. Funny Political Jokes About Washington DC
1. Why don’t politicians play hide and seek in Washington DC? Good luck finding anyone who keeps their promises!
2. What do you call a politician with bad memory in Washington DC? A representative from the state of confusion!
3. Why did the political science professor bring a ladder to Washington DC? To help his students climb the political ladder!
4. How do you get a politician to do stand-up comedy in Washington DC? Just tell them it’s time for their daily press conference!
5. Why was the political debate in Washington DC like a tennis match? Because it was filled with back-and-forth arguments!
6. What do you call a politician who sleeps all day in Washington DC? A lobbyist for the snooze button!
7. Why did the politician go to the chiropractor in Washington DC? To get their back-pats realigned!
8. How do Washington DC politicians stay in shape? By running around the issues all day!
9. What do you call a politician who can’t keep a secret in Washington DC? A leaker of the House!
10. How do you become a successful politician in Washington DC? By always knowing when to filibust a move!
3. The Top Laugh-Out-Loud DC Jokes That Will Leave You in Stitches
1. Why did the Washington DC elevator break down? It couldn’t handle the Capitol punishment!
2. What do you call a musical about Washington DC politics? The Sound of Filibusters!
3. Why did the Washington DC banana go to therapy? It had a bad peeling about the city!
4. How do you make a Washington DC politician disappear? Just ask them to pass a budget!
5. What’s the only thing faster than a speeding ticket in Washington DC? A politician dodging a question!
6. Why did the Washington DC streetlamp win a award? It really knew how to shine in the dark!
7. How do you get a politician’s attention in Washington DC? Just drop a dollar bill on the floor!
8. What do you call a Washington DC weather forecast that’s always wrong? A congressional snow job!
9. Why did the Washington DC map get so tired? It folded under pressure!
10. How do you know you’ve crossed the line in Washington DC politics? When you can’t see the middle ground anymore!
4. Washington DC Puns That Will Have You Rolling on the Floor with Laughter
1. What do you call a DC superhero who fights crime with tax deductions? The Taxinator!
2. Why did the Washington DC clock never get invited to parties? It always ticked people off!
3. How does a politician in Washington DC stop a baby’s whining? By giving them a lobbyist pacifier!
4. Why did the Washington DC mailbox have a successful career? It always knew how to deliver the news!
5. What’s a politician’s favorite ride at the Washington DC amusement park? The spin cycle!
6. Why did the Washington DC coffee shop get so popular among politicians? They always served a latte hot air!
7. How do you win a debate against a Washington DC lawyer? Just filibust their arguments!
8. What’s a politician’s favorite musical instrument in Washington DC? The saxophone, because it’s always ready to play some smooth jazz!
9. Why did the Washington DC dictionary go on strike? It suffered from a bad definition of benefits!
10. How does a politician in Washington DC solve a mystery? By throwing enough red herrings to confuse everyone!
5. Side-Splitting Jokes About Washington DC That Will Brighten Your Day
1. Why did the Washington DC street sign get arrested? For being a real traffic Jedi in the city!
2. What’s a politician’s favorite sport in Washington DC? Passing the buck!
3. Why did the Washington DC mirror go to therapy? It couldn’t handle so many reflections of power!
4. How do you get a job in Washington DC as a tour guide? Just say you can lead people through the maze of politics!
5. What’s a politician’s favorite type of comedy in Washington DC? Satire, because it’s always on point!
6. Why did the Washington DC river refuse to flow? It was on strike for better water rights!
7. What’s a politician’s favorite snack in Washington DC? Pork barrel chips!
8. How do you get a politician’s attention in Washington DC? Just wave a dollar bill in front of them!
9. Why did the Washington DC tree join the government? It wanted to branch out into politics!
10. How do you know a politician is telling the truth in Washington DC? Their pants aren’t on fire!