In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best thermometer jokes, thermometer puns and thermometer dad jokes to make you laugh.
1. Temperature Rising: Hilarious Thermometer Jokes to Make You Laugh
1. Why did the thermometer go to school? Because it wanted to get a degree in high temperatures!
2. What do you call a thermometer that only measures hot temperatures? A heat-seeking missile!
3. Why did the thermometer break up with the ruler? Because it couldn’t handle the distance!
4. How does a thermometer get invited to all the parties? It brings the heat!
5. What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder? “You may have volume, but I’ve got the temperature!”
6. Why did the thermometer join a band? Because it had perfect pitch!
7. Why did the thermometer bring a lawyer to court? It wanted to make sure the evidence didn’t get too heated!
8. What did the thermometer say to the furnace? “You’re really bringing the heat!”
9. How does a thermometer flirt? It turns up the heat!
10. Why did the thermometer refuse to talk to the barometer? It thought the barometer was full of hot air!
2. Too Hot to Handle: The Funniest Thermometer Puns That Will Crack You Up
1. Why did the thermometer break up with the pressure gauge? It felt too much pressure in the relationship!
2. What do you call a thermometer that tells jokes? A pun-ometer!
3. How does a thermometer greet people? It says, “You’re looking hot today!”
4. Why did the thermometer get a job at the bakery? It wanted to make sure things were at the right temperature!
5. What’s a thermometer’s favorite type of workout? Hot yoga!
6. Why did the thermometer get in trouble at school? It couldn’t keep its temperature under control!
7. What did the thermometer say to the ice cube? “You’re a little too cool for me!”
8. How does a thermometer apologize? It says, “I’m sorry if I made your temperature rise!”
9. Why did the thermometer refuse to go outside? It heard it was going to be too hot to handle!
10. How does a thermometer listen to music? It turns up the heat on the volume!
3. Heating Up the Comedy Scene: Top Thermometer Jokes Guaranteed to Make You Giggle
1. Why did the thermometer get a job as a detective? It wanted to solve some temperature crimes!
2. What do you call a thermometer that tells the best jokes? A stand-up comicrometer!
3. Why did the thermometer start a garden? It wanted to see if things would really heat up!
4. How does a thermometer show its love? It gives warm hugs!
5. What’s a thermometer’s favorite type of movie? Heatwaves!
6. Why did the thermometer break up with the oven? It couldn’t handle the heat of the relationship!
7. What did the thermometer say to the thermostat? “You’re really controlling the temperature in here!”
8. How does a thermometer celebrate a victory? It raises the temperature on the dance floor!
9. Why did the thermometer go to therapy? It had too many temperature changes in its life!
10. How does a thermometer score points in a game? It brings the heat on the scoreboard!
4. Taking the Temperature of Humor: Side-Splitting Thermometer Jokes for a Good Laugh
1. Why did the thermometer go to the party alone? It didn’t want to bring anyone else’s temperature down!
2. What do you call a thermometer that plays basketball? A slam dunk-ometer!
3. Why did the thermometer get a job in construction? It wanted to make sure things were building at the right temperature!
4. How does a thermometer calm down? It takes a chill pill!
5. What’s a thermometer’s favorite vacation spot? The tropics!
6. Why did the thermometer break up with the microwave? It couldn’t handle the heat in the relationship!
7. What did the thermometer say to the sun? “You’re really bringing the heat today!”
8. How does a thermometer win an argument? It turns up the heat on its opponent!
9. Why did the thermometer become an actor? It wanted to take on roles that really tested its temperature range!
10. How does a thermometer sneak up on someone? It creeps up slowly but surely on the heat scale!
5. Laughing All the Way to the Thermometer: The Best Funny Jokes About Taking Your Temperature
1. Why did the thermometer go on a diet? It wanted to reduce its temperature!
2. What do you call a thermometer that’s always late? A fashionably tardy-ometer!
3. Why did the thermometer start a painting class? It wanted to see if things would really heat up on the canvas!
4. How does a thermometer navigate through traffic? It hotlines the speed limit!
5. What’s a thermometer’s favorite holiday? July Heat-enth!
6. Why did the thermometer break up with the refrigerator? It couldn’t handle the cold shoulder!
7. What did the thermometer say to the snowflake? “You’re really sticking out in this temperature!”
8. How does a thermometer handle rejection? It cools down and moves on to the next reading!
9. Why did the thermometer go on a hike? It wanted to see if the temperature would rise with elevation!
10. How does a thermometer stay in shape? It exercises its right to bear temperatures!