Top Temperature Jokes, Temperature Puns, Temperature Dad Jokes & More

In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best temperature jokes, temperature puns and temperature dad jokes to make you laugh.

Hot and Hilarious: The Funniest Temperature Jokes to Make You Sweat with Laughter

1. Why did the thermometer break up with the graduated cylinder? They just couldn’t handle the heat!
2. What did one hot dog say to the other at the BBQ? “Man, it’s getting steamy in here!”
3. Why did the sun go to school? To get a little brighter!
4. How do you organize a space party? You planet!
5. Why did the hot dog race to the finish line? Because it was on a roll!
6. What does the sun drink out of? Sunglasses!
7. What did one volcano say to the other? “I lava you!”
8. How do you make the sun shine brighter? Talk to it until it gets star-struck!
9. What do you call a sun that wears sunglasses? A bright idea!
10. Why did the meteorologist bring a bar of soap to work? They were predicting showers!

Chilling Humor: Ice-Cold Temperature Jokes That Will Send Shivers Down Your Spine

1. What do snowmen like to do on the weekends? Chill out!
2. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!
3. How do you find a snowman in a snowstorm? Look for the carrot!
4. What do you call a snowman in July? A puddle!
5. Why did the snowman call his dog Frost? Because it was a snowdog!
6. What’s the coolest place in the alphabet? The letter B!
7. How do you know if it’s too cold to play outside? Your shadow freezes!
8. Why was the snowman so happy? He heard the snow blower was on the way!
9. Why don’t snowmen ever get in trouble? They have a clean record!
10. What’s a snowman’s favorite breakfast? Ice Krispies!

Heating Up the Comedy: Hot Temperature Jokes That Will Have You in Stitches

1. What did one flame say to the other? “You’re really hot stuff!”
2. How does the sun get around town? By solar-powered energy!
3. Why did the candle break up with the matches? It just couldn’t handle the heat!
4. Why do peppers make great comedians? They always bring the heat!
5. What do you call a bear in the desert? Lost!
6. How do you cool down a room filled with hot air? Open the windows and let the breeze in!
7. Why did the thermometer go to school? To get a degree in hotness!
8. What’s a volcano’s favorite snack? Lava cake!
9. What did one candle say to the other? “You light up my life!”
10. Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? To keep his pants up while he’s putting out fires!

Cool Comedy: Frosty Temperature Jokes That Are Snow Laughing Matter

1. Why did the snowman take up yoga? To find his inner chill!
2. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite!
3. How do you throw a party in outer space? You have to planet!
4. What did one snowflake say to the other? “You’re one in a bazillion!”
5. Why did the snowman bring a map to the party? Because he wanted to find his way to the igloo!
6. How do you fix a broken tomato? With tomato paste!
7. Why did the icicle break up with the glacier? It needed some space!
8. What’s a snowman’s favorite dessert? Ice cream cone-fections!
9. Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems!
10. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!

The Perfect Storm of Humor: Thunderous Temperature Jokes That Will Leave You Crying with Laughter

1. Why was the thundercloud always unhappy? It never got the applause it thunder-fully deserved!
2. How do you describe a lightning bolt at a party? Striking!
3. Why did the lightning bolt go to school? To boost its electric knowledge!
4. What’s a thunderstorm’s favorite game? Lightning round!
5. Why do thunderstorms make great comedians? They always know how to crack a joke!
6. How does a thunderstorm stay positive? It always finds the silver lining!
7. What did the lightning bolt say to the other? “You electrify me!”
8. Why did the tornado break up with the hurricane? It just couldn’t weather the storm!
9. What’s a cloud’s favorite fruit? Thunderberries!
10. Why did the weather report go to therapy? It had too many issues to deal with!