Top Sword Jokes, Sword Puns, Sword Dad Jokes & More

In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best sword jokes, sword puns and sword dad jokes to make you laugh.

The Sharp Wit: Hilarious Sword Jokes That Will Leave You in Stitches

1. Why did the sword break up with the shield? It felt too smothered.
2. How does a sword introduce itself? “I’m a cut above the rest.”
3. What’s a sword’s favorite type of music? Heavy metal.
4. Why was the sword in therapy? It had too many cutting remarks.
5. What do you call a baby sword? An infant-ry.
6. Why did the sword go to school? To sharpen its wit.
7. How did the sword propose to his girlfriend? With a karat ring.
8. What did the sword say to the dragon? Let’s meet for a duel brunch.
9. Why did the sword start a band? It had a sharp sense of music.
10. What do you call a sword that’s always on time? Punctual blade.

Cutting Edge Humor: The Top Sword Jokes Guaranteed to Make You Laugh

1. Why did the sword bring a ladder to the duel? To take the fighting to a new level.
2. What’s a sword’s favorite type of party? A pointy party.
3. How does a pirate sword ask for directions? “Argh you lost?!”
4. Why did the sword break up with his girlfriend? She wasn’t his type.
5. What’s a sword’s favorite type of movie? Swashbucklers.
6. Why did the sword call the handyman? Its hilt needed fixing.
7. How does a sword stay in shape? By doing cut-ups.
8. What does a sword use to pay for things? Cut-lery.
9. Why did the sword get a job at the bakery? It kneaded the dough.
10. How does a sword greet its friends? “Point taken!”

Slice of Laughter: Funny and Clever Sword Jokes That Will Bring Joy to Your Day

1. Why was the sword late to the party? It couldn’t get out of its sheath.
2. How does a sword make a phone call? With a slash and dial.
3. What’s a sword’s favorite game? Poke-mon.
4. Why did the sword go to the party alone? It couldn’t find a good plus-one.
5. What do you call a talking sword? Sharp-tongued.
6. Why did the sword go to school? To become a cutting-edge thinker.
7. How does a sword take selfies? With a slice of life.
8. What do you call a sword that tells jokes? A sharp wit.
9. Why did the sword get locked out of the castle? It forgot its keyblade.
10. How does a sword get into a club? It has a killer edge.

Swordplay Shenanigans: Laugh Out Loud with These Side-Splitting Sword Jokes

1. Why did the sword refuse to work out? It didn’t want to get too jacked.
2. How does a sword express emotions? By point-ing them out.
3. What’s a sword’s favorite type of TV show? Swordfights on demand.
4. Why did the sword go to therapy? It had too many deep-seated issues.
5. What do you call a sword that’s feeling down? Pointless.
6. Why did the sword join the debate team? It wanted to cut through the arguments.
7. How does a sword cool off in the summer? By staying in the shade.
8. What’s a sword’s favorite type of dessert? Cut-cake.
9. Why did the sword break up with its crush? It couldn’t handle the pointy end of the relationship.
10. How does a sword sign autographs? With a sharpie.

Blade Banter: The Best Sword Jokes to Brighten Your Day with Humor

1. Why did the sword spend too much time on social media? It was caught up in a sword-of-war situation.
2. How does a sword cheer up a friend? With a little sword-of-kindness.
3. What’s a sword’s favorite pet? A point-er.
4. Why did the sword have trouble making friends? It had a sharp tongue.
5. What do you call a sword’s favorite food? Sword-fish.
6. Why did the sword lose its job as a chef? It kept cutting corners.
7. How does a sword relax on weekends? By taking a stab at meditation.
8. What’s a sword’s favorite type of humor? Cutting-edge comedy.
9. Why did the sword break up with its significant other? It couldn’t handle the pointy end of the relationship.
10. How does a sword stay warm in the winter? By getting into a heated duel.