Top Surgeon Jokes, Surgeon Puns, Surgeon Dad Jokes & More

In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best surgeon jokes, surgeon puns and surgeon dad jokes to make you laugh.

10 Hilarious Surgeon Jokes Guaranteed to Make You Laugh

1. Why did the surgeon break up with his girlfriend? She kept leaving him in stitches.
2. What do you call a surgeon who loves to play video games? A Poke-mon.
3. How does a surgeon say grace before a meal? Let us give thanks for this slice of life.
4. Why did the surgeon carry a red pen to work? In case they needed to draw blood.
5. What did the surgeon say to the rude patient? “Suture-self.”
6. Why did the tomato turn red during surgery? It saw the salad dressing.
7. What do you get when you cross a surgeon with a cat? A purr-fect operation.
8. Why was the surgeon always calm under pressure? He had a lot of patients.
9. What’s a surgeon’s favorite kind of music? Oper-ahh music.
10. Why did the surgeon become a magician? He wanted to make his patients disappear.

Laugh Out Loud with These Side-Splitting Surgeon Jokes

1. Why was the surgeon always the life of the party? He knew how to cut loose.
2. What do you call a surgeon who operates on potatoes? A tater-surgeon.
3. Why did the surgeon bring a ladder to work? To climb the ranks.
4. How do surgeons communicate during surgery? With great incision.
5. Why was the math book sad after surgery? It had too many problems.
6. What did the surgeon say at the end of a successful operation? “Suture-self, I’m good.”
7. Why did the surgeon become a gardener? He loved to do root canals.
8. Why did the surgeon go to culinary school? He wanted to make the cut in the kitchen.
9. What do you call a surgeon who sings at work? A scalpel-erina.
10. Why did the surgeon bring a map to the operating room? In case he needed to dissect directions.

The Funniest Jokes Only Surgeons Will Understand

1. Why did the surgeon cross the road? To get to the other scalpel.
2. What do surgeons eat for breakfast? Wheaties – they’re known for their incisions.
3. Why did the surgeon go to the beach? To see all the swellings.
4. What do you call a surgeon with a sense of humor? A cut-up.
5. Why did the surgeon become a comedian? He had a sharp wit.
6. How do surgeons stay warm during surgery? They have great bedside manner.
7. Why did the surgeon bring a glue gun to work? In case he needed to stick it all back together.
8. What’s a surgeon’s favorite dessert? S’More-gery.
9. Why did the surgeon become a painter? He loved to paint the town red.
10. What did the surgeon say to the patient who was always late for appointments? “Looks like we have a ticking time bomb.”

Get Ready to Roll on the Floor with These Rib-Tickling Surgeon Jokes

1. Why did the surgeon never play hide-and-seek? Good luck trying to find him – he blends in with the white coats.
2. What do you call a surgeon who is always late? An artery – never on time!
3. Why was the surgeon always calm during surgery? He knew how to keep his patients in stitches.
4. What do you call a surgeon with a cold? A hack-tor.
5. Why was the surgeon always the life of the party? He had a knack for cutting up.
6. How does a surgeon like his coffee? Depresso – he likes it a latte.
7. Why did the surgeon become a gardener? He loved to see his patients bloom.
8. What’s a surgeon’s favorite dance move? The incision slide.
9. Why did the surgeon carry a red pen to work? For emergency coloring outside the lines.
10. What do surgeons listen to in the operating room? HIP-hop music.

Top 10 Surgeon Jokes That Will Leave You in Stitches

1. Why did the surgeon bring a pencil to work? In case he needed to draw blood.
2. What do you call a surgeon with a sense of humor? A cut-up.
3. Why did the surgeon become a chef? He had a knife for detail.
4. What’s a surgeon’s favorite game? Operation – they know all the ins and outs.
5. Why did the surgeon become a baker? He kneaded the dough.
6. How does a surgeon keep calm during surgery? He knows how to cut to the chase.
7. Why did the surgeon start a garden? He had great bedside manor.
8. What’s a surgeon’s favorite animal? The scalpel-otter.
9. Why did the surgeon become a comedian? He had the perfect punchline.
10. What do you call a surgeon who loves to dance? A cut-a-rug.