In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best smoking jokes, smoking puns and smoking dad jokes to make you laugh.
Up in Smoke: The Top 10 Hilarious Smoking Jokes
1. Why did the cigarette go to the dentist? Because it needed a smoke check!
2. How does a smoker exercise? By doing lunges.
3. What did the cigarette say to the lighter? You light up my life!
4. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field… smoking a cigarette!
5. What do you call a smoking dinosaur? A stegasaurus!
6. Why did the cigarette break up with the match? It just wasn’t a good match.
7. How does a smoker cook a turkey? They smoke it!
8. Why did the cigarette lose the race? It ran out of breath!
9. What’s the best type of tea for a smoker? Lipton… with a hint of ash!
10. Why did the cigarette refuse to fight? It didn’t want to get burnt!
Lighten Up: 10 Side-Splitting Funny Jokes About Smoking
1. How does a smoker greet people? With a se-cig salute!
2. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, but it let out a little wine… just like a smoker!
3. Why did the cigarette go to the psychiatrist? It had too many issues to roll with!
4. How did the cigarette break up with its girlfriend? She was too much of a drag!
5. Why don’t cigarettes like going to parties? They always have to go outside for a smoke break!
6. Why does smoking make you look cool? Because you’re always surrounded by mist!
7. What do you call a smoking tree? A chain smoker!
8. Why was the cigarette always late? Because it was dragging its feet!
9. How many cigarettes does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, but it’ll probably burn out quickly!
10. Why did the can of snuff get kicked out of the party? It kept going up in smoke!
Blowing Smoke: Laugh Out Loud with These Smoking Jokes
1. Why did the cigarette go to school? To get a little more puff-education!
2. What did the cigarette say to the pack of matches? I’m fired up for you!
3. How do you teach a cigarette to swim? You throw it into deep water!
4. Why was the cigarette a bad influence? It always had a negative attitude!
5. What do you call a smoker who quit cold turkey? A poultry-geist!
6. Why don’t cigarette smokers play hide and seek? Good luck hiding that smoke!
7. What did the pack of cigarettes study in school? Butt-erfly anatomy!
8. Why did the cigarette join a band? It wanted to be a real hot stick!
9. What do you get when you mix a cigarette and a popsicle? A smoke-sicle!
10. Why did the cigarette go to the circus? It wanted to be in the big top… hat of smoke!