In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best skyrim jokes, skyrim puns and skyrim dad jokes to make you laugh.
1. Let’s Get Fus Ro Dah with These Hilarious Skyrim Jokes!
1. Why did the Dragonborn go to the bakery? For some sweet rolls.
2. What do you call a cat in Skyrim who can pick locks? A khajiit burglar.
3. How does a dragon answer the phone? “Call of Duty.”
4. Why did the dovahkiin join a band? To learn the shout harmonies.
5. What do you call a snowman in Skyrim? An icicleborn.
6. Why was the skeleton bad at archery? He had no guts.
7. How does a dragon relax after a long day of destroying towns? By listening to scales music.
8. Why did the bandit bring a ladder to the dungeon? He heard the loot was on the top level.
9. What’s a dragon’s favorite instrument? A flamethrower.
10. How do you get a high-five from a giant in Skyrim? You have to look up to them.
2. Shout Out to These Side-Splitting Skyrim Funny Jokes
1. Why did the dragon cross the road in Skyrim? To eat the chicken on the other side.
2. What do you call a mage who loves to clean? A sorcerer with a mop.
3. Why don’t bandits play hide and seek in Skyrim? Because good luck hiding when everything is marked on the map.
4. What’s a mudcrab’s favorite band? The Beatles, of course.
5. Why did the sweetroll go to the party alone? Because it didn’t want to be stolen.
6. How do you make a draugr laugh? Tell them a dead joke.
7. What do you call an Argonian who is a good cook? An eggcellent chef.
8. Why did the adventurer bring a map to the restaurant? To navigate through the menu.
9. What’s a Thalmor’s favorite type of music? High Elf notes.
10. How does a werewolf eat their steak in Skyrim? Rare.
3. Laugh Your Way Through Tamriel with These Top Skyrim Jokes
1. Why did the dragonborn bring a pillow to fight Alduin? For a comfy defeat.
2. What’s a falmer’s favorite song? Dark Side of the Moon.
3. Why did the Stormcloak listen to music before battle? To get pumped up with battle hymns.
4. What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit? Blood oranges.
5. Why don’t dragons eat clowns? They taste funny.
6. What do you call a Khajiit detective? Sherlock Meowls.
7. Why did the Draugr go to therapy? To deal with their past-life issues.
8. How does a Hagraven style her hair? With a crow-barrette.
9. What’s a mammoth’s favorite type of seafood? Squid-fric.
10. Why was the dovahkiin a good gardener? Because they always had shouts of water.
4. The Dragonborn’s Guide to Gut-Busting Skyrim Jokes
1. Why did the bandit bring a ladder to the fight against the Dragonborn? To reach new heights in being defeated.
2. What’s a Forsworn’s favorite type of joke? Rock puns.
3. Why did the chicken cross the river in Skyrim? To escape being turned into sweet rolls.
4. How does a wabbajack pick up a date? By turning heads.
5. Why did the Thieves Guild thief skip breakfast? Because they heard the best loot was a stolen pastry.
6. What do you call a giant who loves to dance? A DiscoFroe.
7. Why did the bard get kicked out of the inn? They were too lute to handle.
8. How does an assassin stay calm under pressure? By taking a stealthy breath.
9. What’s a draugr’s favorite part of a joke? The deadpan delivery.
10. Why did the Dragonborn join a book club? To learn the shouts of silent reading.
5. From Whiterun to Windhelm: Unleash Your Laughter with These Skyrim Jokes
1. Why was the wizard bad at baseball? He could only conjure foul balls.
2. What do you call a vigilant of Stendarr who loves puns? A holy joker.
3. Why did the adventurer bring a spoon to the bar? To stir up trouble.
4. How does a Khajiit relax after a long day of trading in Skyrim? By taking a purr-cation.
5. Why did the Dunmer go to the blacksmith? To buy some Ash-y pieces.
6. What’s a giant’s favorite flavor of ice cream? Rocky road.
7. Why don’t vampires like garlic bread in Skyrim? Because it has a heavy garlic enchantment.
8. How does a mage keep track of their spells? By taking notes in spell-books.
9. What’s a Dwemer’s favorite type of poetry? Metallic verses.
10. Why did the bandit become a painter? They heard stealing hearts was too mainstream.