In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best sick jokes, sick puns and sick dad jokes to make you laugh.
Hilarious Sick Jokes: The Ultimate List of Dark Humor Jokes
1. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two-tired.
2. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
3. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!
4. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
5. Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems.
6. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
7. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
8. I’m reading a book on the history of glue… I just can’t seem to put it down.
9. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
10. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
Laugh Until You Cry: The Funniest Sick Jokes Guaranteed to Offend
1. My girlfriend told me to stop playing Wonderwall on guitar… I said maybe.
2. Why couldn’t the lifeguard save the hippie? He was too far out, man.
3. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
4. I told my friend 10 jokes to make him laugh. Sadly, no pun in ten did.
5. Did you hear about the kidnapping at the playground? They woke up.
6. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
7. Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they will never meet.
8. Why couldn’t the bicycle find its way home? It lost its bearings.
9. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
10. Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
Gut-Busting Laughs: The Top Sick Jokes That Will Have You Rolling
1. I’m friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.
2. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
3. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
4. Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his Scrabble letters on the road. I asked him, “What’s the word on the street?”
5. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.
6. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
7. To the guy who invented zero: thanks for nothing.
8. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
9. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
10. Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom? Because the “P” is silent.
Inappropriate and Funny: The Best Sick Jokes for a Morbid Sense of Humor
1. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
2. Why couldn’t the bicycle find its way home? It lost its bearings.
3. Why do we tell actors to “break a leg?” Because every play has a cast.
4. Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they will never meet.
5. What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work? A can’t opener.
6. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
7. Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? He made a mint.
8. Why do chicken coops only have two doors? Because if they had four, they’d be chicken sedans.
9. Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.
10. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
Twisted Humor at its Best: The Most Offensive Yet Side-Splitting Sick Jokes
1. I’m friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.
2. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
3. Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
4. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
5. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
6. Why do we tell actors to “break a leg?” Because every play has a cast.
7. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
8. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
9. Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his Scrabble letters on the road. I asked him, “What’s the word on the street?”
10. Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom? Because the “P” is silent.