In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best religious jokes, religious puns and religious dad jokes to make you laugh.
Heavenly Humor: The Funniest Religious Jokes to Brighten Your Day
1. Why do angels never get sick? Because they have heavenly bodies!
2. How does Moses make his coffee? Hebrews it!
3. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!
4. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
5. How do we know that Job went to heaven? Because he had Job security!
6. Why couldn’t Jonah trust the ocean? Because he knew there was something fishy about it!
7. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
8. Why did Eve never have a date with Adam? Because he always wanted a bite of her apple!
9. What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator!
10. Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems!
Laughing with the Lord: Hilarious Jokes About Faith and Religion
1. Why did the baker go to church? He kneaded the dough!
2. Why was the belt arrested? For holding up a pair of pants!
3. Why do cows go to church on Sundays? To listen to the moosic!
4. Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems!
5. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
6. Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be bagels!
7. How does a nun keep her skin looking young? By praying wrinkle cream!
8. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
9. How does a vampire make tea? With a cryptonite!
10. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
Holy Hilarity: Top 10 Religious Jokes That Will Make You LOL
1. Why did the sun go to school? To get a little brighter!
2. What did one lamb say to the other lamb on Easter? “I’ll catch you on the lamb flip side!”
3. Why did Noah finish building the ark before he needed it? He wanted to carry things out in a flood-proof box!
4. Why was the picnic basket watching the soccer game? It wanted to learn how to be a good goalie!
5. What do you call a bear with no ears? B!
6. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
7. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite!
8. Did you hear about the man who lost the entire left side of his body? He’s all right now!
9. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired!
10. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
Divine Comedy: The Best Church Jokes Guaranteed to Make You Smirk
1. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired!
2. Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It was feeling crumbly!
3. Why was Cinderella so bad at soccer? Because she kept running away from the ball!
4. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite!
5. Why did the pig go to the beach? It wanted to be a hot dog!
6. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!
7. What do you give a sick bird? Tweetment!
8. How did the barber win the race? He knew a shortcut!
9. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
10. Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems!
Sacred Stand-Up: Religious Jokes That Will Have You Rolling in the Aisles
1. Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they’d be called bagels!
2. What did the grape do when he got stepped on? He just let out a little wine!
3. How do you organize a space party? You planet!
4. Why did the belt get arrested? It was holding up a pair of pants!
5. What’s a tornado’s favorite game? Twister!
6. Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems!
7. How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it!
8. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
9. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
10. Why did the vampire turn down a job offer? He felt it would be a pain in the neck!