Top President Jokes, President Puns, President Dad Jokes & More

In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best president jokes, president puns and president dad jokes to make you laugh.

Hilarious Presidential Jokes That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud

1. Why did George Washington chop down the cherry tree? Because he couldn’t lie about it!
2. What do you call a president’s army of followers? His cabinet.
3. How does a president keep his cool? He lets out a little executive branch.
4. How did Thomas Jefferson respond when asked if he wanted fries with his order? “No, I’m independent!”
5. Why did Abraham Lincoln wear a tall hat? To keep his head held high.
6. Why was the White House always so clean when Theodore Roosevelt was president? Because he always kept a Rough Rider on duty.
7. What did Franklin D. Roosevelt say to his cabinet when they disagreed with him? “I’m the chief, you’re just a cabinet!”
8. If John F. Kennedy were alive today, what would he be famous for? Being really, really old.
9. Why did Richard Nixon refuse to play cards? Because he always got dealt a Watergate.
10. What did Barack Obama say to his fruit salad? “Yes we can!”

Top Funny Jokes About Presidents That Will Have You Rolling

1. Why did George Bush break the clock? He wanted to see time fly.
2. What do you call a pile of kittens? A meowtain.
3. Why did Ronald Reagan go to the bank? To get some jellybeans.
4. How did Jimmy Carter fix his broken lightbulb? With a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
5. What did Bill Clinton say to Monica Lewinsky? “You can call me Mr. President.”
6. Why did George W. Bush go to therapy? To work on his “weapons of mass distraction.”
7. What did Obama say to Putin after a heated argument? “Let’s put the Vlad blood behind us.”
8. Why did Trump get a pet chicken? To show he was capable of a poultry pardon.
9. How did Joe Biden win over the voters? With some “Joe-king” around.
10. What did Abraham Lincoln say to his wife on his wedding night? “I’m going to free the slaves… of boredom!”

Laugh at These Presidential Jokes: The Best of the Best

1. Why did George Washington never get lost? Because he always knew where he stood.
2. How do you know if a president is telling a lie? His lips are moving.
3. Why did John Adams wear suspenders? To keep his pants in line with the Constitution.
4. Why was James Madison a terrible magician? He couldn’t make the Bill of Rights disappear.
5. How did Andrew Jackson feel about public speaking? He always had a lot to say, but never anything he wanted to publicize.
6. What did Martin Van Buren say when someone asked to borrow his pen? “I’m keeping it in reserve.”
7. Why did William Henry Harrison refuse to take sick leave? He was determined to work through a “case of the sniffles.”
8. How did Woodrow Wilson keep track of his thoughts? He wrote them down on his Fourteen Points.
9. Why did Harry Truman always carry a spare change? Because he never knew when the buck would stop.
10. What did Dwight D. Eisenhower say when he couldn’t find his favorite cereal? “Ike-an’t believe it!”

Prepare to Giggle: The Funniest Jokes About Presidents

1. Why did JFK go to the comedy club? To catch the latest stand-up performance.
2. What did Lyndon B. Johnson say when asked if he wanted to go swimming? “I’m all in, just like my policies.”
3. How did Gerald Ford fix his dentures? With a little presidential adhesive.
4. Why was Richard Nixon always well-dressed? He knew how to “Water-gate” his outfits.
5. What did Jimmy Carter say when his favorite pen ran out of ink? “Looks like I need a White House refill.”
6. Why did Ronald Reagan bring a ladder into the Oval Office? He wanted to raise the bar.
7. How did Bill Clinton stay in shape? He jogged his memory.
8. Why did George H.W. Bush never run out of hot sauce? He always had his Secret Service spice blend.
9. What did George W. Bush say after playing a round of golf? “I don’t always hit the fairway, but I always find the Rough Riders.”
10. Why did Barack Obama become a beekeeper? He wanted to create a buzz in the garden.

From Washington to Trump: The Ultimate Collection of Presidential Jokes

1. What did Washington say when he hugged a tree? “If you can’t be the president, at least be presidential.”
2. Why did John Adams start a vegetable garden? He wanted to show that he wasn’t just a “potato head.”
3. How did Jefferson feel about playing hide-and-seek? He always loved a little Declaration of Independence.
4. What did Madison say to his sassy wife? “Don’t start a war of 1812 in the kitchen.”
5. Why did Monroe never go skiing? He didn’t want to risk a Monroe Doctrine-tipped over.
6. How did John Quincy Adams handle a bad hair day? He went for a presidential comb-over.
7. What did Andrew Jackson say when he didn’t get his way? “I’ll take it to the River.”
8. Why did Martin Van Buren become a librarian? He wanted to check out some “Van”dam’s Laws.
9. What did William Henry Harrison do when he was cold? He put on an extra presidential scarf.
10. Why did John Tyler always throw great parties? He knew how to Tyler one on!