In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best nurse jokes, nurse puns and nurse dad jokes to make you laugh.
Nurses just wanna have puns: The top punny jokes for nurses
1. Why did the nurse carry a red pen?
In case they needed to draw blood!
2. When do nurses bring red markers to work?
To draw blood!
3. Why did the nurse keep the bedpan in the freezer?
To give their patients a chilling experience!
4. Why don’t nurses trust stairs?
They’re always up to something!
5. What did the nurse say to the patient with a runny nose?
“Nurse to meet you!”
6. Why do nurses always bring a pencil to work?
In case they make a “boo-boo!”
7. Why are nurses always calm?
They have a lot of patients!
8. How do nurses communicate with each other in the hospital?
By wearing scrubs!
9. Why did the nurse always carry a penlight?
To shed some light on the situation!
10. What did the nurse say to the rude patient?
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to needle you!”
Laughing all the way to the ER: Hilarious nurse gags to brighten your day
1. Why don’t nurses trust people with kidney stones?
They take everything for granite!
2. What do you call a knowledgeable nurse?
A pedia-trick!
3. Why do nurses love Halloween?
They get to dress up as “nurse-culas!”
4. Why did the nurse carry a red marker to work?
In case they needed to “diagram” a situation!
5. What did the nurse say to the patient with a broken arm?
“I’ll be right back, I need to “cast” a spell!”
6. Why did the nurse wear a stethoscope to prom?
To listen to their heart’s desires!
7. How do nurses stay calm during emergencies?
They put on their “trauma” face!
8. Why did the nurse wear sunglasses to work?
To keep an “eye” on their patients!
9. What did the nurse say to the complaining patient?
“Don’t worry, this too shall “IV” pass!”
10. Why do nurses always carry Band-Aids?
In case they need to “patch” things up!
Scrubs and chuckles: The funniest jokes only nurses will understand
1. Why did the nurse carry a red pen?
In case they needed to “draw” conclusions!
2. What do you call a nurse with a bad back?
A back “stabber”!
3. Why was the nurse always calm during emergencies?
They had “patience”!
4. What did the nurse say to the patient with the broken leg?
“I’ll “leg” you know if it’s serious!”
5. Why did the nurse carry a red marker to work?
To make sure “everything” was red flagged!
6. What did the nurse say to the patient with a sore throat?
“Just a “little prick,” it won’t hurt!”
7. Why do nurses always carry a penlight?
To “shine a light” on the situation!
8. How do nurses stay organized?
They have a lot of “patients”!
9. What did the nurse say to the patient who kept complaining?
“Keep “vital” signs of progress!”
10. Why are nurses always calm?
They have a lot of “patient” humor!
Medication for the soul: The best nurse quips to lift your spirits
1. Why did the nurse always have a positive attitude?
They had a “good dosage” of humor!
2. What do you call a nurse with a good bedside manner?
A “pill”ow of strength!
3. Why did the nurse wear a stethoscope to bed?
To listen to their “dreams!”
4. Why do nurses love Mondays?
They get to “start fresh!”
5. What did the nurse say to the patient with a broken heart?
“I’ll “mend” things right away!”
6. Why is humor important for nurses?
It’s the best “medicine”!
7. What did the nurse say to the patient who kept sneezing?
“Bless you, but no more “sick” jokes!”
8. Why do nurses always have a positive outlook?
They believe in “healing” laughter!
9. What did the nurse say to the patient with a headache?
“I’ll “bandage” the situation!”
10. Why do nurses always carry a smile?
They know it’s the best “prescription” for happiness!
A dose of humor: Injecting laughter with the top nurse jokes of all time
1. Why did the nurse wear red socks?
In case they needed to “sock it to ’em!”
2. What do you call a nurse who loves to laugh?
A “giggle” nurse!
3. Why did the nurse always carry a red pen?
To “pen”etrate the situation!
4. What did the nurse say to the patient with a broken bone?
“I’ll “splint” into action!”
5. Why do nurses have the best sense of humor?
Because they know laughter is the “best medicine!”
6. What did the nurse say to the patient who kept coughing?
“I’ll “cough” up a diagnosis!”
7. Why was the nurse always cool under pressure?
They had a “chill pill” on hand!
8. What did the nurse say to the busy doctor?
“Let me “nurse” you back to health!”
9. Why do nurses always carry a red marker?
To “highlight” the important stuff!
10. What did the nurse say to the patient who kept groaning?
“Don’t worry, we’ll have you “moaning” with laughter in no time!”