In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best metallica jokes, metallica puns and metallica dad jokes to make you laugh.
“Rocking Laughter: The Top Metallica Jokes That Will Make You Headbang with Humor”
1. Why did Metallica go to school?
Because they heard they could “Master of Puppets” there.
2. How does Metallica like their steak?
Enter Sandman, please!
3. What did Metallica say to the noisy refrigerator?
“Shut up, you Battery!”
4. Why did the Metallica fan bring a ladder to the concert?
To see Master of Puppets in higher fidelity.
5. What did Metallica say when they ran out of gas on the highway?
Nothing Else Matters – we’ll just Ride the Lightning!
6. What did the drummer say when he got lost on the way to a Metallica concert?
Seek and Destroy the GPS!
7. Why was Metallica so good at sewing?
Because they could Fade to Black and back again!
8. How does Metallica like their eggs?
With a side of Creeping Death.
9. Why don’t metalheads ever get lost?
Because they always follow the Master of Maps!
10. Why did Metallica get kicked out of the library?
For Master of Puppets-ing too loud.
“Laughing All the Way to the Mosh Pit: Hilarious Metallica Jokes That Will Make Fans Crack Up”
1. Why did the Metallica fan bring a calendar to the concert?
To keep track of the “Days of Metal.”
2. What did Metallica say to the vegetable garden?
Nothing Else Matters, let’s Harvest the Earth!
3. Why did Metallica open a bakery?
To serve some Breadfan tunes.
4. What did Metallica say when they got a new pet cat?
Welcome home, Seek and Pounce!
5. How does Metallica greet their fans at meet and greets?
With a hearty “Wherever I May Roam, you’re welcome!”
6. Why did Metallica start a carpentry business?
To build some Enter Sandmansions.
7. What did the Metallica fan say at the haunted house?
“Turn the Lights Out, I ain’t scared – I’m a Metalhead!”
8. How does Metallica like their coffee?
With some Whiplash creamer.
9. Why did Metallica bring a deck of cards to the recording studio?
To play some Motorbreath poker during breaks.
10. What did Metallica say after a successful concert?
“We’re on Top of the World, until the next show!”
“Metallica Mayhem: Funny Jokes About the Legendary Band That Will Have You in Stitches”
1. Why did Metallica join a circus?
To show off their Master of Puppets skills in a different arena.
2. What did Metallica say to the broken computer?
“Reload, and we’ll Fixxxer right up!”
3. Why did Metallica start a gardening business?
To help the plants “Escape” their pots.
4. What did Metallica say to the lost sheep on their farm?
“Don’t worry, little one – you’re Wherever I May Graze.”
5. How does Metallica deal with a broken heart?
They Turn the Page and start anew.
6. Why did Metallica become chefs?
To bring some heavy metal flavor to their meals.
7. What did Metallica say when they met a fan with a Metallica tattoo?
“Wow, that’s some Load you’re carrying there!”
8. Why did Metallica start a pet grooming service?
To help animals rock their fur in style.
9. What did Metallica say when they won an award?
We’re not just Masters of Metal, we’re Masters of Everything!
10. Why did Metallica become astronauts?
To boldly go where no band has gone before – Enter the Black Hole.
“Heavy Metal Humor: The Best Metallica Jokes for Die-Hard Fans and Comedy Enthusiasts Alike”
1. Why did Metallica dress up in costumes on Halloween?
To give their fans some Creeping Dread!
2. What did Metallica say to the overeager fan?
“Easy, buddy – we want to see you Jump in the Fire, not into the band!”
3. Why did Metallica start a detective agency?
To solve some Master of Clue-pets mysteries.
4. What did Metallica say when they discovered a new planet?
“Ride the Lightning, we’re not alone out here!”
5. How does Metallica handle a broken guitar string?
They Kirk Hammett-up and play on.
6. Why did Metallica become painters?
To add some heavy metal art to the world.
7. What did Metallica say when the tour bus broke down?
“No worries, we’ll just Trap the Lightning and keep on rolling.”
8. Why did Metallica start a magic show?
To make their fans say “Wow, that’s …And Justice for Tricks!”
9. What did Metallica say to the unruly crowd?
“Stop: The Unforgiven … unless you want to keep rocking with us!”
10. Why did Metallica start a rollercoaster business?
To give fans the thrill of a “Whiplash” ride, in real life.