Top Gold Jokes, Gold Puns, Gold Dad Jokes & More

In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best gold jokes, gold puns and gold dad jokes to make you laugh.

Golden Laughter: The Top 10 Hilarious Gold Jokes

1. Why did the gold miner go to therapy? He had too many issues.
2. What did the gold nugget say to the shovel? You’re the only one who digs me.
3. How does gold greet other metals? Au revoir!
4. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants to the course? In case he got a hole in one!
5. Why are gold and silver afraid of the sun? They’re always getting melted down.
6. What did the gold say to the silver at the party? Au you think you are?
7. Why did the gold medalist get arrested? He was caught “au”ging in illegal activities.
8. How does a pirate know if he’s found real gold? It arrrring when he sees it!
9. Why was the goldfish bad at hide and seek? Because it always got caught in the net.
10. What do you call a group of musical gold bars? A heavy metal band.

Shining Comedy: Gold Jokes Guaranteed to Make You Chuckle

1. Why did the bank robber take a bar of gold with him to the casino? He heard it was a “golden” opportunity.
2. What did the gold say to the prospector? Just mine your own business!
3. Why do gold and silver make terrible detectives? They always follow the wrong leads.
4. How does a leprechaun find his pot of gold at the end of the rainbow? He follows the rainbow road!
5. What’s a pirate’s favorite type of gold? “Bar”celona gold!
6. Why did the golfer bring extra socks to the tournament? In case he got a hole in one, he could celebrate with a sock-er punch.
7. How did the rapper know his lyrics were worth their weight in gold? They had a lot of “au”thenticity.
8. What did the golden retriever say to the other dog? I’m a “gold”en opportunity for a good friend!
9. Why did the goldfish join a band? Because it had scales!
10. How do you make a gold bar laugh? Tickle its “au”ditory nerves.

Pure Gold Humor: The Funniest Jokes About Gold

1. Why did the gold medalist refuse to wear his medal? He didn’t want people to think he was “heavy metal”.
2. What did one gold bar say to the other gold bar at the bank? Let’s stick together!
3. Why do pirates love gold puns? They arrrrrrrr very funny.
4. What did the comedian say when he saw a pile of fool’s gold? That’s a real “knugget” of wisdom!
5. How do you know when you’ve hit the jackpot with gold jokes? When they make you feel like you struck gold!
6. Why did the miner bring his pet canary to work in the gold mine? To teach it some “golden” rules.
7. How do you turn your old gold jewelry into a musical instrument? By selling it and buying a sax-a-gold!
8. Where did the prospector take his date? To a gold mine, because he wanted to strike it rich in love.
9. What did the gold bar say to the silver coin? You’re not worth your weight in gold!
10. Why did the goldfish refuse to share its food? Because it was “shellfish”!

24 Karat Comedy: Laugh Out Loud with These Gold Jokes

1. Why do gold miners make terrible comedians? They always dig up old material.
2. What did the gold coin say to the penny? You’re just small change compared to me!
3. Why did the pirate go to the doctor after finding gold? He had a case of “booty” rash.
4. How did the gold digger become a millionaire? By starting out as a billionaire and going gold digging.
5. Why don’t gold bars play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding something that shiny!
6. What’s a pirate’s favorite store to buy gold? The “bar”gain bin.
7. Why was the Olympic gold medalist bad at gardening? They couldn’t handle the pressure of turning silver into gold.
8. Why did the goldfish get a speeding ticket? It was swimming too “fin” fast!
9. How does a gold bar answer the phone? With a “ring, ring, ring”!
10. What did the gold wedding ring say to the engagement ring? Our love is solid as gold!

Golden Banter: Share a Smile with These Gold Jokes

1. Why did the gold coin go to school? To get his silver lining!
2. How does a gold digger become a successful comedian? By mining his own business!
3. What did the goldfish say to the sunken treasure chest? You’re really sunk in!
4. Why did the leprechaun refuse to sell his gold? Because it was worth its weight in “golder” coins!
5. How did the gold nugget make a fortune in the stock market? By striking “ore”!
6. Why did the jewelry store owner laugh at the gold necklace? Because it was a real “chain” of events!
7. How did the gold bar make friends with the silver bar? By showing it the “golden” rule of friendship.
8. What did the pirate say when he found a treasure chest filled with gold? “Shiver me timbers, this be a golden opportunity!”
9. Why did the gold coin refuse to jump in the fountain? It didn’t want to make a “splash”!
10. How does a gold chain cheer up a sad necklace? By sending it “au”some jokes!