In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best destiny jokes, destiny puns and destiny dad jokes to make you laugh.
Guardian Humor: The Funniest Destiny Jokes to Brighten Your Day
1. Why did the Hunter bring a ladder to the Vault of Glass? To reach the high ground, of course!
2. How does a Warlock keep their kitchen clean? With Dawnblade, of course!
3. What did the Titan say to their ghost when it wouldn’t stop nagging them? “I’ll punch you into orbit!”
4. Why did Cayde-6 go to the store? To pick up some Ace of Spades!
5. What did the Hive knight say to the Guardian who defeated them in a strike? “Oryx and Crake, you got me!”
6. How do Guardians stay cool during a Crucible match? They just chill with Icebreaker!
7. Why do Hunters make great detectives? They always find a way to Golden Gun their suspects!
8. What’s a Guardian’s favorite dance move? The Warlock Shuffle!
9. How did Ikora Rey win the Guardian talent show? With her amazing Nova Bomb performance!
10. Why did the Guardian go to the haunted house? To show the Hive what a real scream is!
Laugh Until You Raid: Hilarious Destiny Jokes for Gamers
1. What’s a Titan’s favorite part of a sandwich? The Fist of Havoc, of course!
2. Why do Warlocks make terrible stand-up comedians? Because their jokes keep getting lost in the Void!
3. How does a Hunter like their coffee? Stealthy and sharp!
4. Why did the Guardian join a band? To get some sick drops!
5. What did the Exo say to the Cabal who challenged them to a fight? “Looks like you picked a bad time to mess with a machine!”
6. Why was Cayde-6 such a great chef? Because he always knew how to spice things up!
7. How do Guardians like their pizza? With extra Glimmer and a side of Light!
8. Why did the Fallen try to learn comedy? To get some Ether laughs!
9. What did the Vex say when they couldn’t solve a riddle? “I need more time!”
10. Why don’t Guardians play hide and seek with the Taken? Because they always find a way to cheat with their blights!
Vanguard Comedy: Top Destiny Jokes Guaranteed to Make You Chuckle
1. Why don’t Hunters eat during raids? They can’t find the time to sit down for a Golden Gun break!
2. How do Guardians stay in shape? They do squats in front of Shaxx to work their Thunderthighs!
3. What did the Titan say when they ran out of ammo? “I guess I’ll just have to punch my problems away!”
4. Why did Ikora Rey go to the bar? To drown her sorrows with some good old-fashioned Stormtrance!
5. Why did the Fireteam cross the road? To get to the other strike!
6. What did the Guardian say to the Hive knight after defeating them in Gambit? “I’ll take that motes and raise you a facepalm!”
7. Why did the Hunter bring a backpack to the Tower? To hold all their cloaks, of course!
8. How do Guardians keep warm on cold nights? By snuggling up with their ghost!
9. Why was the Warlock such a bad dancer? Because they always Rift when they should have been Cha-Cha’ing!
10. What did the Guardian say to the Taken Phalanx who kept knocking them off cliffs? “You really pushed me to my edge!”
From Strikes to Strikes: Destiny Jokes That Will Have You in Stitches
1. What’s a Guardian’s favorite ice cream flavor? Vex Milk Vanilla!
2. Why did the Guardian cross the solar system? To get to the other side of the Traveler!
3. How does a Titan stay organized? With their Fist of Order!
4. Why did Shaxx go to the spa? To get a little R&R from all the Crucible chaos!
5. Why did the Guardian become a hairdresser? To get a cut above the rest!
6. What did the Guardian say to their fireteam during a raid? “Stick together like we’re tethered!”
7. Why did the Vex fail at stand-up comedy? Their material was too time-travelled to be funny!
8. What’s a Guardian’s favorite movie genre? Sci-fi with a touch of Light!
9. How do Guardians stay up to date with the latest news in the Tower? They tune in to ZavalaVision!
10. Why did the Guardian challenge the Cabal to a dance-off? To show them the true power of the Traveler’s light!
Lighten Up, Guardian: The Best Destiny Jokes to Keep You entertained
1. What’s a Hive wizard’s favorite musical instrument? The Dark Choir!
2. Why did the Guardian go to the barber shop? To get a fresh cut with a celestial nudge!
3. How many Titans does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just punch the darkness away!
4. Why did the Taken captain start a book club? To get more eyeballs on the latest Toland novel!
5. What did the Warlock say to the Hunter who kept dying in the same spot? “You need to learn how to dodge better!”
6. How does the Traveler like its tea? Lightly steeped with a hint of Arc!
7. Why did the Guardian take a photo of the Cabal? To capture the Psion-tific moment!
8. What did the Hive knight say to their ghost after a defeat? “Looks like we Oryx-pested our welcome!”
9. Why did the Warlock challenge the Vex to a chess match? To see who could calculate victory faster!
10. What’s a Guardian’s favorite TV show? The Last Word on the Traveler’s light!