Top Crab Jokes, Crab Puns, Crab Dad Jokes & More

In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best crab jokes, crab puns and crab dad jokes to make you laugh.

Claws for Laughs: The Top Crab Jokes That Will Have You Cracking Up

1. Why did the crab never share his food? Because he was shellfish!
2. What do you call a crab who plays baseball? A pinch hitter!
3. Why did the crab go to the seafood disco? He heard they were serving up some great beats!
4. How do crabs send mail? By lobster (post)!
5. Why did the crab blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom!
6. What do you call a crab that works at a construction site? A bob-the-builder crab!
7. What did the crab do to improve its math skills? It did some crab-ulations!
8. How does a crab answer the phone? “Shello?”
9. Why did the crab bring a shovel to the party? Because it heard they were serving up some killer sand-wiches!
10. What do crabs use to navigate the sea? Map-ster claws!

Shell-arious Jokes: The Funniest Crab Puns to Make You Chuckle

1. What did the crab say to the shrimp at the beach party? “Let’s shell-abrate!”
2. Why was the crab so good at math? Because it had strong num-bers!
3. What did the crab do when it saw a bank robbery? It called the claw enforcement!
4. How do crabs settle an argument? They have a clawedinary debate!
5. Why did the crab refuse to share its secrets? Because it didn’t want to spill the beans (or the crab butter)!
6. What do you call a crab who loves to tell jokes? A shell clown!
7. How do crabs tell time underwater? With a sand timer!
8. Why did the crab wear a tie to the business meeting? To look sharp!
9. What do you get when you cross a crab with a porcupine? Pinchy situation!
10. Why did the crab go to school? To become a crab-solutely brilliant student!

Laughing Crustaceans: Hilarious Crab Jokes That Will Have You in Stitches

1. Why was the crab always so happy? Because it had a great sense of shell-humor!
2. What did the crab say when it performed stand-up comedy? “I’m claw-some!”
3. Why did the crab refuse to play hide-and-seek? Because it was too crab-sy!
4. How do crabs make decisions? They flip a coin-trovert!
5. What do you call a lazy crab? A crustacean of habit!
6. Why was the crab embarrassed at the beach party? It lost its shell-phone!
7. What did the crab say to the seaweed? “Wrap it up, we’re shell-f!
8. How do crabs stay up to date with the news? They read the claw-per!
9. Why did the crab fail its driving test? Because it kept making illegal U-turns!
10. What do you call a crab who loves to dance? The claw-stropheness!

Pinch Perfect Humor: The Best Crab Jokes to Brighten Your Day

1. Why did the crab join the band? It had a great talent for playing the claws-aphone!
2. What do you call a crab with a heart of gold? A “crab-mazing” friend!
3. Why did the crab wear sunglasses to the beach? Because it wanted to be crab-ulous!
4. How do crabs resolve conflicts in the ocean? They have a pinch-off!
5. What did the crab say to the mermaid? “You’re mer-mazing!”
6. Why did the crab decide to run for mayor? Because it wanted to make the ocean a better plaice!
7. How do crabs keep fit? They do claw-bic exercises!
8. What do you call a crab who loves to read? A book-eater!
9. Why did the crab get a tattoo? Because it wanted to show its claws and stripes!
10. What do crabs do for fun on their day off? They go claw-destrian shopping!

Claw-some Comedy: Funny Crab Jokes Guaranteed to Make You Smile

1. Why do crabs never give to charity? Because they’re shell-fish!
2. What do you call a crab who is also a doctor? A stetho-scope crab!
3. Why did the crab bring a ladder to the party? It heard the punch was below sea level!
4. How do crabs travel on vacation? In their shell-icopter!
5. What do you call a crab who loves to sing? A shell-ebrity!
6. Why did the crab wear a wig to the party? To look extra claw-ssy!
7. How do crabs stay motivated? They set claw-some goals!
8. What did the crab say to the fish who stole its wallet? “You’re a crook, I’ll have to pinch you for that!”
9. Why did the crab get a job at the bank? Because it knew the value of a good pinch!
10. What do crabs do on their day off? They go shell-fie hunting!