In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best court jokes, court puns and court dad jokes to make you laugh.
Hilarious Hearsay: Courtroom Jokes That Will Have You Gaveling with Laughter
1. Why did the lawyer bring a ladder to court? He heard the case was about a high-profile crime.
2. What do you call a professional marksman in a courtroom? A lawsuit hound.
3. Why was the math book unhappy with the court case? It couldn’t count on the evidence.
4. How does a judge stay cool in the courtroom? They always find a verdict fan.
5. Why did the lawyer bring a pencil to court? In case they needed to draw a conclusion.
6. What did the judge say to the dentist in court? You have the right to remain plaque-less.
7. Why did the judge go to the gym before court? To work on their justice muscles.
8. How do you know if a courtroom is haunted? The case keeps getting appealed by the ghost of the defendant.
9. What’s a lawyer’s favorite type of music? Lawsuits.
10. Why did the court artist get in trouble? They kept drawing the judge’s good side.
The Wit-ness Stand: Funny Jokes Told in the Courtroom
1. Why do lawyers make terrible comedians? Their closing arguments are always the punchline.
2. Why did the judge wear sunglasses in court? They wanted to keep their verdicts shady.
3. What’s a lawyer’s favorite thing about a difficult case? The objections!
4. How do lawyers say goodbye in court? We’ll see you in court-er!
5. Why did the courtroom carpet get arrested? It was caught red-handed.
6. What did the lawyer say to the jury when they won the case? Justice has been served…with a side of fries.
7. Why did the judge bring a map to court? They wanted to make sure they didn’t lose their way to a fair trial.
8. What’s a pirate’s favorite part of a court case? The arrr-guments.
9. Why was the courtroom so cold? It was full of chilling testimonies.
10. Why did the judge become a baker after retiring? They loved handing out just desserts.
Judge for Yourself: The Top Courtroom Jokes That Will Have You Banging Your Gavel
1. Why did the lawyer bring a mirror to court? To show the opposing counsel their reflection on the case.
2. What do you call a judge who loves to garden? The honorable weed-er.
3. Why did the court jester never get in trouble? They always had a good defense…of jokes.
4. How do you know if a lawyer is lying? Their pants are on trial.
5. Why did the judge decide to become a stand-up comedian? They knew how to deliver a verdict punchline.
6. What’s a lawyer’s favorite coffee drink? A lawsuit-a latte.
7. Why did the courtroom break up with its date? It kept objecting to the relationship.
8. How do judges stay in shape? They always exercise their contempt muscles.
9. Why did the courtroom play hide and seek? The evidence was hiding in plain sight.
10. What do you call it when a courtroom catches fire? Witness protection…from the flames.
Legal Laughs: The Best Jokes From the Courtroom
1. Why did the lawyer become a chef? They loved serving justice with a side of humor.
2. What’s a judge’s favorite TV show? Law and Order: Special Puns Unit.
3. Why did the courtroom become a popular hangout spot? Everyone wanted to be “bar” certified.
4. How do judges greet each other in the morning? They make a brief case for a good day.
5. Why did the lawyer bring a dictionary to court? They wanted to define justice for the jury.
6. What do you call a lawyer who owns a winery? A barrister.
7. Why was the courtroom so tired? The case kept dragging on.
8. How do lawyers celebrate a win in court? With a legal brief party.
9. Why was the courtroom so noisy? The evidence kept objecting.
10. What’s a judge’s favorite dessert? Just-ice cream.
Order in the Court! Funny Jokes That Will Have You Objecting to the Laughter
1. Why did the courtroom have such great cell service? They had a strong jurisdiction.
2. What do you call a lawyer who’s also a musician? A legal note.
3. Why did the judge become a beekeeper after retiring? They wanted to handle cases that had a lot of buzz.
4. How do lawyers stay organized? They always file their jokes under “humerus evidence.”
5. Why was the courtroom so messy? The evidence was all over the docket.
6. What’s a lawyer’s favorite type of sandwich? Subpoena salad.
7. Why did the courtroom become a library? It had too many cases that needed to be shelved.
8. How do judges greet each other at a party? They raise a toast to justice!
9. Why was the court jester the best witness? They always had an arresting performance.
10. What’s a lawyer’s favorite type of movie? The kind with a motion for sequel.