In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best cattle jokes, cattle puns and cattle dad jokes to make you laugh.
Moo-velous Jokes: The Top Hilarious Cattle Jokes that Will Have You in Stitches
1. Why did the cow go to outer space?
Because it wanted to see the moooon!
2. What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer!
3. Why was the baby cow afraid?
Because it was a little cow-ward!
4. How does a farmer count his cows?
With a cowculator!
5. What do you call a cow that plays the guitar?
A moo-sician!
6. What do you get from a pampered cow?
Spoiled milk!
7. What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
8. Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side!
9. What do you call a cow with a sense of humor?
Laughing stock!
10. How do cows stay up to date with current events?
They read the moospaper!
Laugh Out Loud: Funny Cow Jokes to Brighten Your Day
1. What did the mama cow say to the baby cow?
It’s pasture bedtime!
2. What do you call a cow that just had a baby?
Decalfinated!
3. Why don’t cows ever have any money?
Because farmers milk them dry!
4. What do you call a cow that loves to garden?
A grass farmer!
5. Why don’t cows ever have any spare change?
Because they’re always cashed out!
6. What do you call a cow that’s afraid of everything?
A cow-ard!
7. Why did the cow become a magician?
Because it wanted to make the milk disappear!
8. How do cows keep up with the news?
They read the daily moos!
9. Why did the cow wear a bell around its neck?
Because its horn didn’t work!
10. How do cows like their steak cooked?
Moo-well done!
Udderly Ridiculous: The Best Cattle Jokes Guaranteed to Make You Smile
1. What do you call a cow that likes to play piano?
A moo-sician!
2. Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don’t work!
3. What do you call a cow who works for the government?
Bureaucow!
4. What do you get when you cross a cow and a duck?
Milk and quackers!
5. What do you call a cow that can’t give milk?
An udder failure!
6. Why was the cow always frustrated?
Because people kept milking its jokes!
7. What do you call a cow who just had a baby?
Decalfinated!
8. Why did the cow go to outer space?
To see the moooon!
9. What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
10. How does a farmer count his cows?
With a cowculator!
From Bull to Calf: A Compilation of the Funniest Cow Jokes
1. What do you call a cow with two legs?
Lean beef!
2. Why did the cow go to the movies?
Because it wanted to see the moovie!
3. Why did the cow go to school?
Because it wanted to be a calf-a-demic!
4. What do you call a cow eating grass?
A lawn moo-er!
5. Why did the cow become a travel agent?
Because it wanted to see the world!
6. How do cows stay up to date with current events?
They read the moospaper!
7. Why was the baby cow always crying?
Because it was having a moood swing!
8. What do you call a cow that plays piano?
Moozart!
9. What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
A new moother!
10. What do you get when you cross an angry cow and a grumpy chicken?
An animal that’s in a really bad moood!
Grazing Giggles: A Roundup of the Most Amoozing Cattle Jokes for All Ages
1. Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?
Because they lactose!
2. Why did the cow go to the spa?
Because it needed some me-time!
3. How did the cow win the talent show?
It knew how to milk it!
4. What did the cow say to the farmer?
“Mooove along now!”
5. Why did the cow become a detective?
It wanted to solve the mystery of the missing milk!
6. How do cows stay cool in the summer?
They use cow-ttons!
7. What do you call a cow that’s just given birth?
Deja-moo!
8. Why did the cow go to the baseball game?
To catch a fly ball!
9. How do cows say goodbye?
They wave with their udder!
10. Why don’t cows ever have any spare change?
Because they’re always cashed out!