In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best amsterdam jokes, amsterdam puns and amsterdam dad jokes to make you laugh.
“Getting High on Humor: The Top Amsterdam Jokes That Will Leave You Rolling”
1. Why don’t they play hide and seek in Amsterdam?
Because good luck finding a hiding spot when everyone’s been smoking weed!
2. Did you hear about the Dutch farmer who couldn’t find his cows?
He kept looking in all the coffee shops.
3. What do you call a cyclist in Amsterdam with a flat tire?
Tyred.
4. How do you know if someone is from Amsterdam?
They don’t say hi, they say high.
5. Why did the tourist go to Amsterdam in the winter?
To experience the high season.
6. What’s a stoner’s favorite mode of transportation in Amsterdam?
The high-speed bike lane.
7. Why did the artist move to Amsterdam?
He heard it was a great place to get inspiration for his high art.
8. Why did the squirrel visit Amsterdam?
To get some high-quality nuts.
9. What do you call a Dutch comedian who tells jokes about Amsterdam?
A hash tag comedian.
10. Why did the baker in Amsterdam go out of business?
He kept forgetting to put the dough in the oven, but it’s fine, he made a lot of dough selling brownies.
“Laughing Canal-side: Amsterdam’s Funniest Jokes That Will Make You Burst Out in Laughter”
1. Why do the Dutch love to sail on the canals in Amsterdam?
Because it’s smooth sailing!
2. How do you know if someone is a tourist in Amsterdam?
They’re the ones taking pictures of the bikes, not the canals.
3. Why do the Dutch never play hide and seek on a canal boat?
They always end up in plain sight.
4. Why did the Dutch chef open a restaurant on a canal boat?
He wanted to bring a new meaning to “floating” cuisine.
5. What do you call a cat who loves to swim in the canals of Amsterdam?
A purrmaid.
6. Why was the duck in Amsterdam always the life of the party?
Because it knew how to quack everyone up.
7. How do you know if someone is a tour guide in Amsterdam?
They make a lot of canal-related puns.
8. Why did the comedian take a boat tour in Amsterdam?
He wanted to test out his new material on the open waters.
9. What’s a popular canal-side game in Amsterdam?
Duck, duck, cruise.
10. Why do the Dutch love to live on houseboats in Amsterdam?
Because they enjoy a float-lifestyle.
“From Bikes to Brownies: The Hilarious Amsterdam Jokes That Will Make Your Day”
1. Why was the bike in Amsterdam always tired?
It was always getting tired of being chained down.
2. How do you know if someone is late to a meeting in Amsterdam?
They blame it on their slow bike.
3. Why did the Dutch comedian open a bakery in Amsterdam?
To spread joy and brownies, of course.
4. What do you call a Dutch pastry that’s flying under the radar?
A low-flying Dutchman.
5. Why did the baker in Amsterdam start selling edibles?
He wanted to branch out into high-demand products.
6. What do you call a Dutch cyclist who can’t ride straight?
A little bike-curious.
7. Why did the brownie go to Amsterdam?
To get even higher, of course.
8. How do you know if someone is a foodie in Amsterdam?
They take their bikes on a tour of all the best bakeries.
9. What’s a Dutch cyclist’s favorite type of music?
Wheel of fortune.
10. How do you know if someone is a chocolatier in Amsterdam?
They always have a sweet tooth and a bag of weed by their side.
“Amster-damn Funny: The Best Jokes About Amsterdam That Will Have You in Stitches”
1. Why do the Dutch love to wear clogs in Amsterdam?
Because they always want to be one step ahead.
2. How do you know if someone is a comedian in Amsterdam?
They always have a wooden sense of humor.
3. Why did the Dutch farmer open a comedy club in Amsterdam?
He had a lot of good material on crop rotation.
4. What do you call a Dutchman who loves to tell jokes?
A hilariaNED.
5. Why do the Dutch never run out of jokes in Amsterdam?
Because they can always count on their windmills to generate laughter.
6. Why did the Dutch artist paint a picture of Amsterdam’s canals?
To illustrate the height of his career.
7. How do you know if someone is from Amsterdam?
They don’t wear a beret, they wear a clog hat.
8. Why did the Dutch cyclist fall off his bike in Amsterdam?
He couldn’t handle the high maintenance.
9. What’s a Dutch DJ’s favorite canal in Amsterdam?
The turntable canal.
10. How do you know if someone is a Dutch comedian in Amsterdam?
They always land their jokes on a tulip, er, tip.