In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best shot jokes, shot puns and shot dad jokes to make you laugh.
Shots Fired: 10 Hilarious One-Liner Jokes to Make You Laugh
1. Why did the vodka go to school? It wanted to be a little bolder.
2. I told my doctor I’m allergic to tequila, but he said it’s just a margarita of the mind.
3. What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear…perfect for soaking up shots.
4. I asked the bartender for a double entendre, so he gave me two shots of vodka.
5. Why was the rum always gone? Because it couldn’t handle its shots.
6. My friends told me to stop drinking whiskey, but I’m bourbon to be wild.
7. What do you call a drunk who’s also a geologist? A stoner.
8. I walked into a bar and the bartender asked me, “Why the long shot?”
9. I used to have a fear of drinking whiskey, but I’m slowly getting over it one shot at a time.
10. I can’t remember if this is my third, fourth, or fifth shot but who’s counting when you’re having fun?
Bottoms Up: The Funniest Drinking Jokes to Tell at the Bar
1. Why did the wine break up with the beer? It could never handle its hops.
2. I named my dog “Five Miles” so I can tell people I walked five miles every day.
3. What do you call a snowman at a bar? A slush puppy.
4. I’ll never have a liver transplant because I’m a diehard whiskey fan.
5. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
6. I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not too sure.
7. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
8. I stopped drinking coffee…I’m just not a morning person.
9. Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana.
10. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
Get Ready to LOL: The Top Shot Jokes That Will Have You Rolling
1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
2. I’m on a seafood diet…I see food and I eat it.
3. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands like everyone else.
4. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
5. I’m trying to organize a hide and seek tournament, but it’s really hard to find people who want to participate.
6. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
7. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two-tired.
8. I’m friends with 25 letters of the alphabet…I don’t know why.
9. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
10. I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now.
Shot to the Funny Bone: The Best Jokes for Shots and Shots for Jokes
1. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one.
2. I’m writing a book on reverse psychology. Do not read it.
3. What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
4. I’m terrified of elevators, so I’m taking steps to avoid them.
5. I was going to tell a time-travel joke, but you didn’t like it yet.
6. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
7. I’m afraid of speed bumps, but I’m getting over it slowly.
8. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
9. What do you call a fish wearing a crown? A king fish.
10. I’m good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet, but I don’t know why.
Knocking ‘Em Back: Laugh Out Loud with These Shot Jokes and Puns
1. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
2. I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off.
3. I dreamt I was a muffler last night…I woke up exhausted.
4. Why did the grammar teacher go to the bar? To get a gin and tonic.
5. My boss told me to have a good day, so I went home.
6. I have a fear of speed bumps, but I’m slowly getting over it.
7. The best time to add insult to injury is when you’re signing somebody’s cast.
8. The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn’t talking to me.
9. Whiteboards are remarkable.
10. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.