In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best terrible jokes, terrible puns and terrible dad jokes to make you laugh.
Hilariously Bad Jokes That Will Make You Cringe
1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
2. I told the doctor I broke my arm in two places. He told me to stop going to those places.
3. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
4. How do you organize a space party? You planet!
5. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.
6. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
7. What did one wall say to the other wall? I’ll meet you at the corner!
8. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
9. I asked the librarian if they had any books on paranoia. She whispered, “They’re right behind you.”
10. I’m friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.
The Ultimate List of Side-Splittingly Bad Puns
1. I’m friends with a vegetarian. I lettuce be friends.
2. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!
3. I’m trying to organize a hide and seek tournament, but good players are really hard to find.
4. Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.
5. Why does a chicken coop only have two doors? Because if it had four, it would be a chicken sedan.
6. Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they’d be bagels.
7. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
8. I’m friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.
9. Why was the belt arrested? For holding up a pair of pants.
10. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
Laugh Out Loud at These Awful Dad Jokes
1. I wouldn’t buy anything with velcro. It’s a total rip-off.
2. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
3. What did Jay-Z call his girlfriend before they got married? Feyoncé.
4. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.
5. What do you call a fish wearing a crown? A king fish.
6. “I’ll call you later.” Don’t call me later, call me dad!
7. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
8. Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
9. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
10. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
You Won’t Believe These Terribly Funny One-Liners
1. Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
2. I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already.
3. I told my computer I needed a break and now it won’t stop sending me vacation ads.
4. Never trust math teachers who use graph paper. They’re always plotting something.
5. Did you hear about the cheese factory explosion? There was nothing left but debris.
6. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
7. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
8. I asked the librarian if they had any books on paranoia. She whispered, “They’re right behind you.”
9. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.
10. I’m trying to organize a hide and seek tournament, but good players are really hard to find.
The Most Eye-Roll Worthy Jokes That Are So Bad, They’re Good
1. I used to have a job at a calendar factory but I got fired for taking a couple of days off.
2. Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems.
3. I’m friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.
4. I know a lot of jokes about retired people but none of them work.
5. How do you organize a space party? You planet!
6. I have a joke about construction, but I’m still working on it.
7. I’m friends with a vegetarian. I lettuce be friends.
8. Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don’t work.
9. I’m friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.
10. Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.