Top Bedtime Jokes, Bedtime Puns, Bedtime Dad Jokes & More

In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best bedtime jokes, bedtime puns and bedtime dad jokes to make you laugh.

Sweet Dreams Start with a Laugh: The Top 10 Funniest Bedtime Jokes

1. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired!
2. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
3. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
4. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
5. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
6. How does a train eat? It goes chew, chew!
7. Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.
8. Want to hear a construction joke? Oh wait, I’m still working on that one.
9. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!
10. Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems.

Tuck Yourself in with These Hilarious Bedtime Jokes

1. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one!
2. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
3. Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
4. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
5. I asked the librarian if they had any books on paranoia. She whispered, “They’re right behind you.”
6. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
7. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
8. Did you hear about the Italian chef that died? He pasta way.
9. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
10. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite.

Lights Out, Funny On: The Ultimate List of Bedtime Jokes

1. What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator!
2. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
3. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
4. Why couldn’t the bicycle find its way home? It lost its bearings.
5. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
6. Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon? Because she will let it go.
7. Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
8. How does a train eat? It goes chew, chew!
9. What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backward? A receding hare-line.
10. Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems.

Drift off to Sleep with a Smile: Bedtime Jokes Guaranteed to Make You Giggle

1. Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon? Because she will let it go.
2. Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
3. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
4. Did you hear about the Italian chef that died? He pasta way.
5. How does a train eat? It goes chew, chew!
6. Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems.
7. What do you call a bear with no socks on? Barefoot.
8. Want to hear a construction joke? Oh wait, I’m still working on that one.
9. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
10. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired!

Don’t Count Sheep, Count the Laughs: The Best Bedtime Jokes for Kids and Adults

1. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one!
2. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
3. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
4. Did you hear about the Italian chef that died? He pasta way.
5. I asked the librarian if they had any books on paranoia. She whispered, “They’re right behind you.”
6. Why couldn’t the bicycle find its way home? It lost its bearings.
7. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite.
8. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
9. Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems.
10. What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator!