Top Cop Jokes, Cop Puns, Cop Dad Jokes & More

In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best cop jokes, cop puns and cop dad jokes to make you laugh.

The Top Hilarious Cop Jokes Guaranteed to Make You Laugh

1. Why did the cop sit on the toilet? To do his duty.
2. How does a police officer part his hair? In a cop-lick.
3. Why did the police officer go to the baseball game? He heard someone had stolen third base.
4. What do you call a zombie who is also a police officer? A cop-rot.
5. Why did the police officer go to the baseball game? He heard there were too many baseless accusations.
6. What did the ocean say to the police officer? Nothing, it just waved.
7. Why did the police officer bring a pencil to the crime scene? To draw his weapon.
8. How do you make a police officer laugh on a Monday? Tell him a joke on Friday.
9. Why don’t police officers ever get lost? They always follow the right path.
10. Why did the police officer go to the party? He heard they were serving finger prints.

You Know You’re a Cop When… Funny Jokes and One-Liners

1. You know you’re a cop when you get excited to eat a doughnut without any sprinkles.
2. You know you’re a cop when you say “It’s the law!” when picking a restaurant.
3. You know you’re a cop when you have more handcuffs than actual friends.
4. You know you’re a cop when your idea of a vacation is spending time in jail…on duty.
5. You know you’re a cop when you walk into a room and everyone suddenly becomes law-abiding citizens.
6. You know you’re a cop when you start giving your friends tickets for speeding in conversations.
7. You know you’re a cop when you can’t help but correct grammar… and issue a citation.
8. You know you’re a cop when you can’t resist telling someone to “freeze!” during a game of freeze tag.
9. You know you’re a cop when you refuse to wear camouflage because you don’t want to blend in.
10. You know you’re a cop when every time someone asks for your badge number, you hand them your business card.

The Ultimate List of Pun-ny Police Jokes

1. Why did the police officer go to the baseball game? He wanted to catch a foul ball.
2. Why did the police officer go to the bank? He heard there was a robbery in progress.
3. What do you call a sheep who is also a police officer? Baa-dge.
4. Why did the police officer bring a ladder to work? He wanted to climb the ranks.
5. What did one cop say to the other cop when they caught a thief? “Looks like we’ve nailed it.”
6. Why did the police officer bring a pig to the crime scene? To ham it up.
7. What do you call a detective who is also a chef? Sherlock Holmes.
8. Why did the police officer go to the music store? He heard someone had stolen all the beats.
9. Why do police officers make terrible DJs? They always turntable.
10. What do you call a police officer who plays guitar? A rock-er.

Cop Jokes: Laugh Out Loud with These Clever and Witty Jokes

1. Why did the police officer pull over the banana? It was driving too peel.
2. What did the cop say to his belly button? You’re under a vest.
3. Why did the police officer bring a mirror to work? He wanted to reflect on his actions.
4. Why did the police officer bring a ladder to the crime scene? He heard the crime was a high-rise.
5. What do you call a police officer who can swim? A cop fish.
6. Why did the police officer bring a pack of gum to work? He heard the crime was a stick-up.
7. What do you call a police officer who can play chess? Checkmate.
8. Why did the police officer bring a donut to the crime scene? To sweeten the deal.
9. What did the police officer say to the skunk? “Smell you later.”
10. Why did the police officer shoot the clock? Because it kept ticking him off.

From Traffic Stops to Doughnut Shops: Cop Jokes That Will Crack You Up

1. Why did the police officer go to the bakery? He heard there was a loaf-er on the loose.
2. What do you call a police officer who works with animals? A zoo-perintendent.
3. Why did the police officer go to the art gallery? He heard someone had framed a suspect.
4. How do you know if a police officer is a good dancer? He has the right to remain groovy.
5. Why did the police officer bring a plant to work? He was looking to root out crime.
6. What do you call a police officer who loves to fish? A reel cop.
7. Why did the police officer go to the party? He heard there would be a copious amount of fun.
8. What do you call a police officer who only works nights? Officer Dark.
9. Why did the police officer bring a map to work? To find his way back to the station.
10. What did the police officer say to the hula hooper? “You’re under a hip-arrest.”