In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best heavy metal jokes, heavy metal puns and heavy metal dad jokes to make you laugh.
1. 10 Hilarious Heavy Metal Jokes to Rock Your World
1. Why did the heavy metal musician get kicked out of band practice? Because he couldn’t keep time.
2. How do you get a guitarist to stop playing? Put sheet music in front of them.
3. What do you call a cow that plays guitar? A moo-sician.
4. Why did the metalhead bring a ladder to the concert? He wanted to headbang on a higher level.
5. What do you call a guitarist without a girlfriend? Homeless.
6. Why was the heavy metal singer always calm? Because nothing could ruffle his bands.
7. Why did the drummer go to jail? He got caught for beating it.
8. How do you know if a bassist is actually playing? You can hear the strings snap.
9. Why shouldn’t you give a drummer coffee? It might make them double bass.
10. What did the Metallica fan ask for on their birthday? Nothing else even Tali-ers.
2. Laugh Out Loud with These Heavy Metal Puns and One-Liners
1. Did you hear about the metal band that only plays on railways? They have a loco-motive.
2. How do metalheads stay cool at concerts? They stand near the fans.
3. Why do heavy metal fans make bad farmers? They keep losing their hoes and rakes.
4. What do you call a heavy metal magician? Metal-licks the Gathering.
5. Why did the heavy metal fan bring a ladder to the concert? To reach the high notes.
6. Why do heavy metal drummers always look so serious? They have a lot of cymbalism.
7. What’s a metalhead’s favorite type of food? Screamo cheese.
8. Why did the heavy metal fan bring a map to the concert? In case she wanted to mosh pit stop.
9. How do you fix a broken heavy metal band? Use metal screws.
10. What’s a metalhead’s favorite part of the day? The heavy metal hour.
3. Headbanger Humor: The Funniest Heavy Metal Jokes of All Time
1. How do metal bands stay warm in the winter? They gather around the fire pit.
2. Why did the metalhead go to therapy? He had too many issues with distortion.
3. What do you call a heavy metal musician at a crossroads? A b-rock and roll.
4. Why don’t metalheads play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding with all that heavy metal.
5. What do you call a metal band on a boat? Rock the Boat.
6. Why did the heavy metal guitarist get a job at the bakery? He wanted to make some bread.
7. Why did the metalhead refuse to eat at the Chinese restaurant? He didn’t want anything too intense, just a metal-chop suey.
8. What do you call a metalhead with a broken guitar? Un-amp-ped.
9. Why did the drummer join the army? He heard they needed someone to keep the beat.
10. How do you know if a metalhead is at the door? They knock in 4/4 time.
4. Amp Up Your Day with These Side-Splitting Heavy Metal Jokes
1. Why did the metalhead bring a ladder to the concert? He wanted to get to the highest level of headbanging.
2. How does a metal band tidy up after a gig? They thrash the room.
3. What do you call a metal band with an ocean theme? Pearl Jam.
4. Why did the heavy metal musician go to the doctor? He had too much distortion in his ear.
5. What do you call a screaming table? A turntable.
6. How do metal musicians make phone calls? They use metal tone.
7. Why did the heavy metal fan bring a map to the concert? In case they wanted to mosh pit stop.
8. What’s a metalhead’s favorite type of juice? Scream-sicle.
9. What do you call a metal band on a chessboard? Black and Right.
10. Why did the drummer get a job as a chef? He loved to beat it.
5. Metalheads Rejoice: The Ultimate Collection of Laugh-Worthy Heavy Metal Jokes
1. Why do metalheads make bad drivers? They’re always taking the wrong turn into the mosh pit.
2. How do you know if someone is a metalhead? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you… repeatedly.
3. Why did the skeleton go to the heavy metal concert? He heard they were bone-crushing.
4. What do you call a heavy metal band of philosophers? Iron-y Maiden.
5. Why did the guitar player go to therapy? He had too many issues with distortion.
6. What do you call a metalhead who doesn’t like spicy food? A mild head.
7. Why did the heavy metal band break up? They couldn’t handle the tem-pistols.
8. What do you call a metal band on a boat? Rock the Boat.
9. Why did the metalhead refuse to eat Chinese food? He was afraid of getting metal-chop suey.
10. How do metalheads cool down in the summer? They turn up the AC/DC.