In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best card jokes, card puns and card dad jokes to make you laugh.
Deal of Laughs: Hilarious Card Jokes That Will Make You Ace of the Party
1. Why was the poker player always calm? Because he had a good poker face!
2. How do you make a hand of cards laugh? Tell it a funny joke!
3. What do you call a group of card players who are all friends? A full house!
4. Why did the deck of cards go to therapy? It was dealing with too many issues!
5. Why did the king go to the doctor? He had a royal flush!
6. What do you call it when a deck of cards gets a flat tire? A spade puncture!
7. Why was the deck of cards thrown out of the casino? It was cheating at poker!
8. What do you call a card game played on a glacier? Frozen poker!
9. Why did the card shark wear a life jacket? In case he got caught in a flush!
10. How do you make a card shark laugh? Tell them they have a royal flush!
Spade and Neuter: The Funniest Card Jokes to Shuffle Your Spirits
1. Why did the card player bring a ladder to the game? They heard the stakes were high!
2. What do you call a card magician who is also a comedian? A jokester of spades!
3. Why did the card deck break up with the dice? They couldn’t get on the same roll!
4. What do you call a poker player who’s also a chef? A card shark-ooterie!
5. Why did the card player go to the doctor? They had a bad case of deal-abetes!
6. How do card players exercise their minds? By playing solitaire-ly!
7. Why did the ace refuse to talk to the king? He thought he was too full of himself!
8. What do you call a card player who’s always late? A delayed deal-ight!
9. Why was the card deck always in shape? It did a lot of suits up exercises!
10. What do you call it when a deck of cards pulls a prank? A shuffleboard!
Joker’s Wild: Laugh-Out-Loud Card Jokes That Will Have You Dealing with Joy
1. Why do card players make terrible burglars? They always get caught on a pair of deuces!
2. Why did the card deck apply for a job as a comedian? It wanted to be the joker in the pack!
3. How do you make a card laugh? You give it a good deck of jokes!
4. Why don’t card players ever get lost? Because they always know where the hearts are!
5. Why did the king go to therapy? He had a lot of crown issues!
6. What do you call it when a deck of cards tells a bad joke? A card-stastrophe!
7. Why did the card player bring a ruler to the game? To measure the distance between the hearts!
8. What do you call a card game played in a haunted house? Spooky Solitaire!
9. Why was the card deck sad? It had too many clubs to deal with!
10. How do you make a deck of cards into a good listener? You give it a poker face!
A Full House of Funny: Hilarious Card Jokes That Will Make You the King of Comedy
1. Why did the poker player go to the art gallery? To get a good look at all the “hands”!
2. What do you call a card game played by cats? Paw-ker!
3. Why did the card player go to the therapist? They had too many hearts to deal with!
4. What do you call a deck of cards that tells jokes? The kings of comedy!
5. Why did the card deck go on vacation? It needed a royal flush!
6. How do card players stay cool during a game? They keep a poker face!
7. Why don’t card players like surprises? Because they prefer a full house!
8. What do you call a deck of cards that’s always happy? A joker’s delight!
9. Why did the card deck go to school? It wanted to be dealt with properly!
10. How do you make a deck of cards laugh? You tell it a royal joke!
Hearts of Humor: The Best Card Jokes to Suit Your Funny Bone
1. Why was the card deck so confident? It had an ace up its sleeve!
2. What do you call it when a deck of cards throws a party? A full deck celebration!
3. Why did the card player bring a plant to the game? They heard it was a pot(lant) of gold!
4. How do you make a deck of cards into a comedian? You give it a good shuffle!
5. Why was the card deck always looking for love? It had a lot of hearts to give!
6. What do you call a card game played on a snowman? Freeze-frame poker!
7. Why did the card player bring a dictionary to the game? They wanted to check their hand’s spelling!
8. What do you call a deck of cards that’s always tired? A full house of Zzz’s!
9. Why did the card deck go to the gym? It wanted to work on its suits!
10. How do you make a card laugh? You tell it a hilarious joke!