Top Physics Jokes, Physics Puns, Physics Dad Jokes & More

In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best physics jokes, physics puns and physics dad jokes to make you laugh.

1. Hilarious Physics Jokes That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud

1. Why are quantum physicists terrible in relationships? Because when they find the position, they can’t find the momentum.
2. What did the physicist have for lunch? Fission chips.
3. Why can’t you trust an atom? Because they make up everything.
4. What did one photon say to the other photon? “I’m feeling a little light-headed.”
5. Why was the physics teacher upset that his dinner burned? Because he didn’t have enough joules to eat.
6. How does a physicist drink their coffee? With a vacuum.
7. Why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip? To get to the same side.
8. What did one tectonic plate say to the other after a breakup? “It’s not you, it’s me.”
9. Why was Heisenberg so bad at relationships? Because when he had the time, he didn’t have the energy.
10. Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.

2. Top 10 Funny Physics Jokes to Brighten Your Day

1. Why do engineers enjoy doing Laplace transforms? Because they get a kick out of complex analysis.
2. How did the physicist propose to his girlfriend? He got down on one knee and said, “I’ve got my ion you.”
3. Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems.
4. What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber? Nothing, you can’t cross a scalar with a vector.
5. What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder? “You may have graduated, but I’ve got degrees.”
6. Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.
7. How do you organize a space party? You plan it.
8. Why do plants hate math? Because it gives them square roots.
9. Why can’t you trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
10. How does a mathematician plow fields? With a pro-tractor.

3. Physics Puns That Will Have You in Stitches

1. Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He’s 0K now.
2. Why do atoms always keep in touch? Because they make up everything.
3. I told my computer I needed a break, and it froze. Turns out it’s a physics major.
4. What did the angry electron say when it was repelled? “Let me atom.”
5. Why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher? There was no chemistry.
6. I would tell you a joke about quarks, but they’re so small, you wouldn’t even see it coming.
7. What did the physicist eat for dessert? Pi.
8. Why are quantum physicists bad at relationships? They can never really commit.
9. I asked Schrödinger how he was. He replied, “Both good and bad.”
10. Why can’t you trust an atom? Because they make up everything.

4. Laughing Matter: The Best Physics Jokes for Science Lovers

1. I asked the physics teacher if I could borrow a marker, but he couldn’t make a permanent decision.
2. How do you find the missing physicist? Look for the sine of struggle.
3. Why did the chicken cross the road at the speed of 2×10^8 m/s? To see whether it was possible in theory.
4. Schrodinger’s cat walks into a bar. And doesn’t.
5. If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate.
6. Two atoms bump into each other. One says, “I think I’ve lost an electron!” The other asks, “Are you positive?”
7. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
8. I wish I were adenine, so I could be paired with U.
9. Why was the energy drink good at solving problems? Because it had a lot of potential.
10. How does a scientist freshen their breath? With experi-mints.

5. Clever and Witty Physics Jokes Guaranteed to Tickel Your Funny Bone

1. Why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher? There was no chemistry.
2. Why do physicists enjoy playing hide and seek? Because in time, you can always find them.
3. I tried to do stand-up comedy about string theory, but my audience thought it was too knotty.
4. Why are quantum physicists bad at relationships? They can never really commit.
5. What is a physicist’s favorite food at a baseball game? Fission chips.
6. Why did the chicken cross the road? To prove it wasn’t a chicken, it was a superconductor.
7. I told a chemistry joke, but there was no reaction.
8. Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.
9. Never trust an atom, they make up everything.
10. I told a chemistry joke, there was no reaction.