In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best monk jokes, monk puns and monk dad jokes to make you laugh.
1. Hilarious Monk Jokes to Lighten Your Day
1. Why did the monk refuse to meditate in the ocean? He didn’t want to be a little “buoy” in the water.
2. How does a monk greet people in the morning? “Zen greetings to you!”
3. What do you call a monk who is also a detective? Friar Tuck.
4. Why did the monk meditate at the airport? He heard it was a good place to “find your gate.”
5. What did the monk say to the hot dog vendor? “Make me one with everything.”
6. Why do monks never play hide and seek? Because good seekers are hard to find.
7. What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor? “Make me one with everything.”
8. Why did the monk refuse anesthesia during his surgery? He wanted to transcend dental medication.
9. How do you know when a monk has passed their driving test? They reach enlightenment.
10. Why did the monk meditate on the highway? He wanted to find his inner “peace” of asphalt.
2. Side-Splitting Monk Puns Guaranteed to Make You Chuckle
1. Why did the monk refuse to play poker with the other monks? He couldn’t “deal” with the pressure.
2. How did the monk fix his computer? He gave it some “reboot” time.
3. Why did the monk sit on the clock during meditation? He wanted to be in the present moment.
4. How do monks party? They have a “habit” of meditating together.
5. Why did the monk bring a ladder to meditation class? He wanted to reach new levels of Zen.
6. What did the monk say about his homemade bread? It was knead-it-ative.
7. Why did the monk break up with his GPS? He wanted to find his own “inner compass.”
8. What do you call a monk who is always running late? A slow-chi master.
9. Why did the monk go to the doctor? He had a bad case of “karma”.
10. Why couldn’t the monk find his keys? He was too “detached” to remember where he left them.
3. The Funniest Monk One-Liners Ever Told
1. I asked the monk if he had any water. He said, “I don’t drink, I’m just “forward-pour-ty.”
2. Did you hear about the monk who sold his car? He wanted to walk the “middle path” instead.
3. How do you greet a monk who loves to tell jokes? “Buddha” boom, Buddha bing!
4. Why do monks always carry an umbrella with them? In case of any “karmic” showers.
5. What did the monk say to the sandwich vendor? “Make me one with everything.”
6. Why did the monk go to the bank? To find his inner peace.
7. How do you know if a monk likes you? He’ll “chant” your praises.
8. Why did the monk get a job at the bakery? Because he kneaded the dough.
9. What did the monk say to the vacuum cleaner salesman? “I already have enough attachments.”
10. How do monks stay in shape? They practice “Zen” yoga.
4. Belly-Laugh Worthy Monk Humor for a Good Time
1. Why did the monk join the circus? He heard they needed a “Zen” master.
2. How did the monk become a successful musician? He mastered the “bowl” lyre.
3. Why did the monk go to the store? He wanted to find his inner “aisle.”
4. What did the monk say to his GPS? “Turn left at Nirvana.”
5. Why was the monk in a hurry to finish his sandwich? He wanted to “fast” for longer.
6. What did the monk say to the chicken crossing the road? “The path to enlightenment is no yolk.”
7. Why did the monk bring a map to the meditation retreat? He didn’t want to be “lost in thought.”
8. What did the monk say to the shoe salesman? “I’m looking for some sole food.”
9. Why did the monk become a beekeeper? He wanted to be “buzzing” with happiness.
10. How do monks order their coffee? With “extra karma” please.
5. Amusing Monk Jokes That Will Leave You in Stitches
1. Why did the monk bring a pencil to meditation? He heard it was great for “inner-peace” writing.
2. What did the monk say to the flower shop owner? “I’m looking for a bouquet that screams ‘enlightenment’.”
3. Why did the monk bring an empty cup to the tea ceremony? He wanted to embrace “beginner’s mind.”
4. What was the monk’s favorite movie? “The Dharma Bums.”
5. Why did the monk become a barber? He wanted to make everyone “cut” above.
6. What did the monk say to the baker? “I knead your bread to rise dough-terminedly.”
7. Why did the monk open a bakery? He heard it was great for finding his “inner crust.”
8. What did the monk say to the cell phone repairman? “I’m trying to achieve more bars of “inner-nectar.”
9. Why did the monk bring a mirror to the meditation retreat? To reflect on his “inner self.”
10. How do monks keep warm in the winter? With “Karma” chai.