In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best cult jokes, cult puns and cult dad jokes to make you laugh.
Laugh out Loud: The Top Hilarious Cult Jokes You Need to Hear
1. Why did the cult leader go to therapy? He had too many “follower” issues.
2. What do you call a cult of chess enthusiasts? Check-mate-ics.
3. Did you hear about the cult that only accepts musicians? They have a lot of band members.
4. How does a cult leader keep in touch with all their followers? Through a spiritual hotline.
5. Why did the cult break up? They couldn’t agree on a sacrifice schedule.
6. What do you get when you cross a cult with a carnival? The cult of entertaining.
7. How do you join a cult that only accepts vegans? You have to be marinated in kale for 24 hours.
8. Why did the cult of chefs disband? They were too busy arguing over the secret ingredient.
9. Why did the cult of yogis start a bakery? They wanted to rise together.
10. Did you hear about the cult that worships the sun? They’re always bright-eyed and bushy tailed.
Cult Classic Comedy: The Funniest Jokes About Cults
1. Why do cults always hold their meetings in basements? They like to keep a low profile.
2. What do you call a cult that only eats seafood? The Fishy Followers.
3. Why do cults make great farmers? They’re experts at harvesting souls.
4. Why did the cult of comedians disband? They couldn’t take a joke.
5. How do you know a cult is having a party? You can hear the chant music from miles away.
6. Why do cult leaders make terrible stand-up comedians? Their jokes always have a sacrificial punchline.
7. What do you call a cult that’s obsessed with cleanliness? The Order of the Sanitized Souls.
8. Why did the cult of gardeners become unsuccessful? They couldn’t handle the weeds of doubt.
9. How do cults plan their retreats? They hold a “cult council” meeting.
10. Why do cults always have potluck dinners? They believe in sharing their blessings.
Jokes to Cultivate Laughter: The Best Cult Humor
1. Why did the cult of bakers fail? They kept losing their breadwinners.
2. Why was the cult of magicians so secretive? They disappeared without a trace.
3. How do cults stay organized? They have a cult calendar.
4. Why do cults always have a good harvest? They’re experts at sowing seeds of belief.
5. What do you call a cult of hairstylists? The Cult of the Perfect Part.
6. Why do cults always have great potlucks? They have a knack for turning water into wine.
7. How do cults stay connected? Through a spiritual Wi-Fi network.
8. Why did the cult of dentists dissolve? They couldn’t handle the root of the problems.
9. What do you call a cult of cowboys? The Cult of the Cattle Drive.
10. Why did the cult of astronauts disband? They were lost in space.
Cult Following: Hilarious Jokes That Will Make You Rethink Joining a Cult
1. Why do cults always wear sunglasses? They believe in the power of their shades.
2. What do you call a cult of marathon runners? The Endurance Order.
3. Why did the cult of doctors fail? They couldn’t handle the heavy dose of faith.
4. How do cults celebrate their birthdays? With a sacrificial cake.
5. What do you call a cult of fishermen? The Reel Believers.
6. Why did the cult of actors disband? They couldn’t separate reality from role-playing.
7. How do cults handle disagreements? Through a chanting contest.
8. Why did the cult of mathematicians fall apart? They couldn’t solve for X.
9. What do you call a cult of artists? The Creative Congregation.
10. Why did the cult of farmers disband? They were plowed under with doubt.
Cracking Up Cultists: The Funniest Jokes That Will Leave You in Stitches
1. Why do cults always have a BBQ? They like to grill their beliefs.
2. What do you call a cult of detectives? The Investigative Institute.
3. Why did the cult of clowns fail? They couldn’t take anything seriously.
4. How do cults throw a surprise party? They sacrifice the element of surprise.
5. What do you call a cult of firefighters? The Extinguished Followers.
6. Why did the cult of doctors become unpopular? They kept prescribing the holy water.
7. How do cults greet newcomers? With a warm sacrificial hug.
8. Why did the cult of vampires disband? They couldn’t handle the daylight saving rituals.
9. What do you call a cult of chess players? The Knightly Order.
10. Why did the cult of surfers dissolve? They were wiped out by the waves of disbelief.