Top Salad Jokes, Salad Puns, Salad Dad Jokes & More

In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best salad jokes, salad puns and salad dad jokes to make you laugh.

1. Lettuce Entertain You: The Funniest Salad Jokes of All Time

1. Why did the lettuce win the race? Because it was always ahead!
2. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta salad!
3. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired from all the salads!
4. What do you call a sad vegetable? A tear-radicchio!
5. How do you fix a broken salad? With a lettuce leaf!
6. What did the carrot say to the celery at the salad bar? Stop stalking me, I’m getting jalapeƱo business!
7. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
8. How do you make a fruit salad laugh? Tell it a berry good joke!
9. What do you get when you cross a salad with a birthday? A celebration!
10. Why did the grape stop in the middle of the salad? Because it ran out of juice!

2. Just Salad-ing Around: Hilarious Jokes to Make Your Friends Chuckle

1. Did you hear about the salad that won the award? It was outstanding in its field!
2. How do you make a salad more appealing? Dress it up!
3. What did the lettuce say to the celery? Quit stalking me, you’re putting me in a pickle!
4. Why did the carrot break up with the broccoli? It couldn’t handle the pressure in their relationship!
5. Why did the tomato go out with a prune? Because it couldn’t find a date!
6. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a salad? Frost bite!
7. What do you call a chicken looking at a bowl of salad? Poultry in motion!
8. What did the potato say to the radish? You da radish!
9. Why did the onion break up with the bell pepper? It couldn’t handle the spice!
10. How does a lettuce keep its cool? It stays calm as a cucumber!

3. From Veggie Tales to Veggie Jokes: The Best Salad Humor for Any Occasion

1. Why did the cucumber get a job at the salad bar? It had all the right qualifications!
2. What did the grape say when it was stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
3. Why did the lettuce go to the ball? It heard they were tossing a great salad!
4. How do you make a chef laugh? Tickle his ribs – with a salad fork!
5. What’s the best way to catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut salad!
6. Why did the carrot go to the doctor? It needed a vitamin shot!
7. Why did the lemon discontinue its relationship with the lime? It couldn’t handle the sour taste!
8. What did the salad say to the dinner roll? You’re on a roll tonight!
9. How does a salad communicate with the dressing? It gives it a little toss!
10. Why did the bell pepper go to the doctor? It was feeling a little green!

4. Salad Humor: Mixing up Laughter and Leafy Greens

1. Why was the cucumber mad at the radish? It kept making snide remarks!
2. What did the grape do when it got stepped on? It didn’t wine, it just got squished!
3. Why did the chef get fired from the salad bar? He kept dressing down the customers!
4. What do you call a lettuce that sings? Elvis Parsley!
5. How do you make a salad more romantic? You just have to lettuce know what you dressing!
6. Why did the broccoli break up with the cauliflower? It couldn’t handle the pressure to commit!
7. What did the crouton say to the lettuce in the salad bowl? Don’t leaf me hanging here!
8. How do you make a salad laugh on a first date? You have to romaine calm and cucumber yourself!
9. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
10. What do you call a line of rabbits hopping backward? A receding hare-line!

5. Funny Food: Salad Jokes that Will Have You Rolling in the Aisles

1. What do you call a gang of killer lettuce? Icebergers!
2. Why did the pepper put on a coat? Because it was a little chili!
3. Why did the romaine lettuce break up with the radish? It felt like it was always in the shadow!
4. What do you call a salad that is all over the place? A tossed salad!
5. Why did the salad go to the dance? Because it heard the dressing was prom-ising!
6. How do you get a salad to go to sleep? You tuck it in, then you lettuce rest!
7. What did the lettuce say to the celery at the party? Let us dance and have a stalk about it!
8. Why couldn’t the kale go to the party? It wasn’t dressed properly!
9. What do you call a cucumber going through a mid-life crisis? A pickle!
10. Why did the salad go to the barbecue? To a-rugula the guests!