In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best screw jokes, screw puns and screw dad jokes to make you laugh.
Screw You: Hilarious Screw Jokes to Make You Laugh
1. Why did the screw go to school? To become a little bolder.
2. What do you call a screw that loves to party? A screw-loose!
3. How does a screw ask someone out on a date? “Wanna screw around tonight?”
4. What did the screw say to the hammer? “You really nail it!”
5. Why did the screw refuse to go to the party? It didn’t want to get screwed over.
6. How does a screw prove it’s strong? By showing its threads of steel.
7. Why did the screw go to therapy? It had too many screws loose.
8. What did the screw say to the bolt? “You turn me right round, baby, right round.”
9. What’s a screw’s favorite TV show? “Screw It, We’re Going Home.”
10. Why did the screw go to the doctor? It had a case of the spins.
Get Ready to LOL with These Screw Funny Jokes
1. How does a screw propose to its partner? With a diamond-tipped drill bit.
2. Why did the screw bring a ladder to the party? To screw things up!
3. What did the screw say to the screwdriver? “You drive me crazy!”
4. Why did the screw get a job as a comedian? It wanted to screw with people’s minds.
5. What did the screw say when it got stuck? “I’m screwed!”
6. Why did the bolt break up with the screw? It couldn’t handle the pressure.
7. Why did the screw hide in the toolbox? It was afraid of getting screwed over.
8. How does a screw like its coffee? Screw-ped.
9. What did the screwdriver say to the screw? “You’re turning me around!”
10. Why did the screw go to therapy? It had a screwy past.
Keep Calm and Screw On: The Best Screw Jokes
1. How does a screw introduce itself? “I’m screwed.”
2. Why did the screw refuse to budge? It was too tightly wound.
3. What did the screw order at the bar? A screwdriver.
4. Why did the screw refuse to tighten? It had commitment issues.
5. How does a screw get fit? By doing screw-ups at the gym.
6. What did the screw say to the nut? “We make a great pair.”
7. Why did the screw break up with the bolt? It wanted to screw around.
8. How does a screw celebrate a successful day at work? By screwing on vacation.
9. What did the screw do when it felt rusty? It oiled up.
10. Why did the screw go to the hardware store? To find a bolt mate.
Feeling Screwed? These Jokes Will Turn Your Frown Upside Down
1. Why did the screw get a job as a detective? It wanted to screw the case wide open.
2. What did the screw say to the nut when it got stuck? “Let’s screw around a bit.”
3. Why did the screw bring a parachute to the party? Just in case it needed to screw away.
4. How does a screw greet its friends? “Hey, screw you!”
5. What did the screw say to the door? “Let’s screw around and see where it leads.”
6. Why did the screw avoid the magnet? It didn’t want to get attracted to someone else.
7. How does a screw deal with a crisis? By screwing it up even more.
8. What did the screw fall for its neighbor bolt? It felt a spark.
9. Why did the screw go to therapy? To work out its screwy issues.
10. What did the screw say when it finally fit in the hole? “Screw it, finally!”
Laugh Your Screws Off with These Side-Splitting Jokes
1. Why did the screw become a stand-up comedian? It loved to screw around with the audience.
2. What did the screw say to the drill? “Let’s make some holes and have a blast!”
3. Why did the screw go to the repair shop? It was feeling a little stripped.
4. How does a screw show its love? By tightening a little closer.
5. What did the screw do when it felt lonely? It called up its nutty friend.
6. Why did the screw refuse to go on a date with the nail? It didn’t want to get hammered.
7. How does a screw greet its crush? “Hey there, I’m just hanging around.”
8. What did the screw say when it got a promotion? “I’m on cloud nine, screwed up!”
9. Why did the screw go to the party early? It wanted to screw around before everyone else arrived.
10. What did the screw say to the screwdriver at the hardware store? “You drive me in-screw-ne!”