In this very funny joke compilation, we have come up with the best tuesday jokes, tuesday puns and tuesday dad jokes to make you laugh.
Top 10 Hilarious Tuesday Jokes to Brighten Your Day
1. Why did the calendar go to therapy? It had too many issues.
2. What did Tuesday say to Wednesday? “I’m just a day away!”
3. Why was the math book sad on Tuesday? It had too many problems.
4. What do you call a bear with no teeth on a Tuesday? A gummy bear.
5. Why did the cookie cry on Tuesday? Because it was feeling crumby.
6. Why did the scarecrow win an award on Tuesday? Because he was outstanding in his field.
7. How does Tuesday always know when Wednesday is lying? It can see right through it.
8. Why was the broom late on Tuesday? It swept in.
9. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire on a Tuesday? Frostbite.
10. Why did the bicycle fall over on Tuesday? It was two-tired.
Laugh Out Loud with These Side-Splitting Tuesday Jokes
1. Why don’t we ever hear jokes about Tuesdays? Because they’re a little too two-sday.
2. What did the grape say when it got stepped on on Tuesday? Nothing, it just let out a little whine.
3. Why did the clock get promoted on Tuesday? It kept ticking all day long.
4. Why did the man put his money in the blender on Tuesday? He wanted to make some liquid assets.
5. What did the big flower say to the small flower on Tuesday? “Hey there, bud.”
6. Why was the tomato blushing on Tuesday? Because it saw the salad dressing.
7. What’s a vampire’s favorite type of ship on Tuesday? Blood vessels.
8. Why did the music teacher go to jail on Tuesday? Because she got caught selling scales.
9. What did the pencil sharpener say on Tuesday? It felt a little dull.
10. Why did the chicken cross the playground on Tuesday? To get to the other slide.
The Funniest Jokes to Get You Through Tuesday
1. Why don’t skeletons fight each other on Tuesdays? They don’t have the guts.
2. How do you organize a space party on a Tuesday? You planet.
3. What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit on Tuesday? A blood orange.
4. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants on Tuesday? In case he got a hole in one.
5. Why did the math book go to therapy on Tuesday? It had too many problems.
6. What do you call a sleepy vegetable on Tuesday? A yawn-ion.
7. Why was the computer cold on Tuesday? It left its Windows open.
8. How does a penguin build its house on Tuesday? Igloos it together.
9. Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend on Tuesday? They needed some space.
10. Why was the broom late on Tuesday? It swept in.
Make Tuesday a Funday with These Gut-Busting Jokes
1. Why was the doctor so calm on Tuesday? He had a lot of patients.
2. What do you call a group of killer whales playing music on Tuesday? An orca-stra.
3. Why was the math book sad on Tuesday? It had too many problems.
4. What’s a pirate’s favorite day of the week on Tuesday? Aaarrrruesday.
5. Why was the belt arrested on Tuesday? It held up a pair of pants.
6. How does the ocean say hello on Tuesday? It waves.
7. What did the janitor say about the calendar on Tuesday? It was trash.
8. Why was the math book so wrinkled on Tuesday? It got put through some difficult equations.
9. Why did the scarecrow win an award on Tuesday? Because he was outstanding in his field.
10. What do you call a belt made out of watches on Tuesday? A waist of time.
Start Your Tuesday with a Smile: The Best Jokes to Kick Off Your Day
1. Why did the cookie go to the doctor on Tuesday? It was feeling crumbly.
2. What’s a skeleton’s favorite snack on Tuesday? Spare ribs.
3. Why did the scarecrow win an award on Tuesday? Because he was outstanding in his field.
4. What do you call a man with a rubber toe on Tuesday? Roberto.
5. Why did the tomato turn red on Tuesday? It saw the salad dressing.
6. How do you make a tissue dance on Tuesday? Put a little boogey in it.
7. What did one ocean say to the other on Tuesday? Nothing, they just waved.
8. Why did the school kids eat their homework on Tuesday? The teacher said it was a piece of cake.
9. How do you make holy water on Tuesday? You boil the hell out of it.
10. Why was the math book sad on Tuesday? It had too many problems.